


Take My Heart (With You When You Go)

by Salazar101



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Angst, Bits of humor, Drama, FrostIron - Freeform, M/M, Madness, Sickness, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-22
Updated: 2013-10-22
Packaged: 2017-11-26 12:52:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 36,509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/650717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Salazar101/pseuds/Salazar101
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki is sick, madness claws at his mind as an otherworldly parasite ravages him from the inside out.  Tony is whisked away to build Loki his own miniature arc reactor in return for sparing Tony's life.  As time passes it becomes clear it may be too late.  When faced with death and madness how do we react, where do we turn.  It makes monsters of us all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Tear My Heart Out, Replace it With Your Own

**Author's Note:**

> Been working on this story for a few days to have a chapter buffer, so with any luck chapters will be posted once a week/every two weeks. Depends on how big the buffer is.
> 
> I hope you all enjoy, there will be future smut BUT YOU GOTTA WORK FOR IT
> 
> you can find me on tumblr drowning in pictures of Tom Hiddleston at: http://ohgodsalazarwhy.tumblr.com/

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The art in this chapter is by Tabberwok, go pay him a visit!
> 
> http://eyesdownshower.tumblr.com/

 

_It was digging into his brain, he could feel it. He could taste it on his tongue. Hear it. Smell it. He threw himself violently against the wooden table screaming and grabbing his head. Vials of delicate mixtures smashed on the cobbled stone at his feet but he didn't even notice. Who gave a fuck anyway, none of them helped. He scrabbled along the wood as his legs gave out under him, screaming until his voice gave out. Then darkness._

 ~

 “Sir? Captain Rogers is calling for you.”

 

Tony let out a sound of irritation as JARVIS lowered the volume of his blaring rock music, “Ignore,” he said without looking up from the gauntlet he was working on. Whatever Captain Spangle wanted could wait, Tony was kind of in the middle of something.

 

The music increased in volume but quickly faded again, “Sir, he is insisting.”

 

“Uhhhg, JARVIS, tell him I'm jacking off or something,” Tony threw out one hand to bring up the manual control for the music and turn it up again.

 

There were a few short minutes of music and solitude. Tony licked his chapped lips as he adjusted the repulsor on the glove. It was a little bit too weak, meaning he listed to the left more than he'd like. Tony started to put everything together as the music cut off abruptly and Steve's angry voice blasted over the speakers, “Tony!”

 

“Augh,” Tony quickly turned down the volume then got back to work, “Hey Steve, how can I be of service?”

 

“You can suit up!” said Steve, practically yelling loud enough to make Tony's ears ring, “Loki is over the ocean capsizing boats and go knows what else!”

 

“Loki? Why didn't you say so?” Tony smiled to himself as Steve sputtered over the speaker, “You guys go, I'll meet you there... or maybe I'll beat you there.”

 

“Don't go after Loki alone,” said Steve seriously as Tony hefted up his gauntlet while summoning the rest of his suit with a click of the bracelets on his wrist, “There's something... off with him.”

 

Yeah, when wasn't there something off with Loki? “Got it, Captain Hammer,” said Tony blithely.

 

“Captain what? Never mind, hurry up, Tony!” Steve's voice cut off and the music returned at a much softer volume.

 

The suit conformed around Tony like a second skin, the plates all seamlessly fitting together just the way they should. Of course they did, because he made it. The newly fixed gauntlet was slid on manually and then clamped perfectly around his arm. Tony loved the feel of the suit, how the arc reactor hummed in his chest as it fed power into the Mark VII. It almost made him feel invincible. Tony grinned and flicked the faceplate down before zooming out of the workshop.

 

He could handle Loki until the others arrived.

 

“Tony where do you think you're going?”

 

“You're such a nag, darling,” said Tony, turning off his mic so Steve couldn't yell right in his ear. The city streaked below him as Tony flew for the ocean where he could already see abnormally huge waves crashing over the shore. What the hell was Loki's deal? Tony grunt as rain lashed against him, wind sending him spiraling briefly before he adjusted his power output and regained control. Further out in the ocean a freighter had flipped belly up while a rescue ship was desperately trying to stay above the thrashing waves.

 

Loki was hovering in the air, conducting the waves as if they were music, movements frantic and jerky. Steve was right... there was something... off about him. Tony didn't spend too much time thinking about it because that rescue boat was going to capsize any minute now, instead he turned his boosters onto full power and rocketed towards Loki like a missile.

 

“Sir, are you sure this is wise?” asked JARVIS, as calm as ever even as Tony tore through the stormy sky to Loki's writhing body.

 

“Yeah, uh, not so much,” said Tony, eyes narrowing as his targeting system locked onto Loki, “But I need to seriously mess up his game and a simple repulsor blast won't do.”

 

“So you're using your head, I see,” said JARVIS dryly.

 

“Who programmed you to be so sassy?” laughed Tony.

 

“Shall I have a drink ready for when you return?”

 

_If_ you return was always the unspoken clause. Tony grinned recklessly, “Make it so.”

 

Tony slammed into Loki's side so hard that they were both flung wildly out of control. Loki was screaming, fingers digging into Tony's suit as they tried to pry him away but Tony only clung on tighter, the wild ocean rising up to meet their entwined bodies. They splashed through the surf so hard that the breath was driven from Tony's lungs in a pained whoosh, even with the protection of the Mark VII. Loki was still struggling, was it just Tony's imagination or was he less powerful than usual?

 

Slowly Loki stopped thrashing, his hand curled at the back of Tony's neck almost gently. Tony watched as Loki's eyes cleared, open painlessly in the salt water, and then one free hand pressed flat against the light on the front of his suit that indicated the hook up to his arc reactor. What the heeelll... Tony shook Loki like a rag doll and propelled them to the surface, looking up to see the sky had already cleared and the ocean was calm and still. He was holding Loki around the waist with one arm, as if he were a damsel in distress on the cover of a romance novel.

 

“What? No more temper tantrum?” asked Tony, scanning the sky for the rest of the Avengers. He couldn't fly Loki out of the water, his suit wouldn't take the strain. Not only was the guy shockingly heavy for his scrawny build, but he was probably an extra 50 pounds of wet leather and armor. Asgardians.

 

Loki's hand was back on his chest, palm flat against the wet metal as he caressed over the light of the arc reactor. That was freaking Tony out, “No touching,” he said, grabbing Loki's wrist and forcing his hand away. Loki snarled right in his face, fucking _snarled_ like an animal, and Tony jerked his head back, “Whoa, calm down there, I just-”

 

“You're coming with me!” hissed Loki, the first thing he'd said this whole time.

 

“Yeah...no... I don't think so. Look, our ride is here anyway!” Tony pointed to the speck on the horizon that was rapidly increasing in size. Good ol' Steve and the gang.

 

“You act like you have a choice!” Loki grabbed Tony by the front of his faceplate with long spindly fingers before slamming Tony's head down into the water as if it were concrete. Thankfully it gave—of course it did it was water—then Tony was falling. Falling. Falling.

 

He landed with a grunt on hard packed dirt, coughing and wheezing as his body caught up with whatever Loki had just done. Shockingly strong hands peeled away his armor as if it were no more than tin, tossing ruined and crumpled bits this way and that. Tony tried to shoot Loki with a beam from his gauntlet but it was grabbed and ripped off his arm before he was punched in the face hard enough to stun him.

 

“What,” Tony coughed and spat out some blood, “what the hell are you doing?”

 

Loki said nothing, merely wrenched off his chest plate and throwing it somewhere before he was ripping open Tony's shirt---jesus christ what--- and pressing the side of his face against the humming arc reactor.

 

“Yes,” whispered Loki, voice almost a moan, “Yes...”

 

“Okay, you're freaking me out,” said Tony, trying to shove Loki away despite no longer having any armor on his body. Real fear was coiling deep in his gut, was Loki going to remove the arc reactor and kill him? Why? He'd shown little interest in it before, actually, Tony was positive that Loki didn't even know what it was. All he could do was stall and wait for the Avengers to find him. They could too, Bruce could track the energy reading of his arc reactor half-way around the world. It was only a matter of time.

 

Loki jerked up, seeming to recall that the arc reactor was in fact attached to Tony in a most intimate way, “Explain the device!” barked Loki, hand helpfully waving to the arc reactor as if they could be talking about anything else.

 

“No,” said Tony stubbornly.

 

“Tell me or I'll rip it out!” Loki was snarling like an animal again, looking crazy enough to take Tony apart and then cook him up in a stew.

 

“Alright! Alright!” Tony held his hands up beside his head in surrender, the ploy was to buy himself time not get horribly dismembered, “Look it's just... an energy thing, okay? An arc reactor, it keeps metal shrapnel from entering my heart and powers the suits. Very complicated stuff. Brilliant. My design of course.”

 

“Hmmm,” Loki sat up keeping one hand on Tony's chest to pin him like a bug, “Could you make another one?”

 

“Well assuming I had the supplies-”

 

The hand pressed hard enough to make his ribs creak and Tony cut off in a wheeze, “Supplies are no issue!” said Loki hatefully, “Can you do it? Given time and resources?”

 

“I can,” said Tony hoarsely, tugging at Loki's wrist to try and get him to lighten up the load a little bit.

 

Loki looked inordinately pleased with himself, like a cat licking cream from its chops, “Then it's settled, you will build me one of these devices.”

 

“Uhhh no I don't think I w-ILLgck!” Tony scrabbled at Loki's arm as he was picked up by the neck and lead further into...the cave? Tony wasn't sure where they were. He was slammed back into the rock wall where metal bands weaved around his arms and legs to hold him suspended.

 

“That wasn't a friendly request,” breathed Loki right against Tony's face, his breath smelled of something old and rotting. Tony gagged and coughed, turning his head aside. “You WILL build me one of these devices, and in return I will not kill you.”

 

“As generous as that offer sounds, I think I'm going to paa- hey get your hands off!” Loki's fingers stroked around the edge of the arc reactor, feeling it over. Tony struggled against the metal but it didn't even creak, fucking magic. It didn't take long before Loki figured out how to twist the arc reactor out of its cradle with a hiss and Tony's breath caught in his throat. Where were the other Avengers?!

 

“So beautiful,” crooned Loki, leaning in close and then pressing the reactor, still attached to Tony with the wiring, against his temple, “So perfect...” Loki straightened, reactor still clutched in his claw-like grasp. “Anthony Stark,” he purred right in Tony's face, causing him to gag again, “Here is my deal: I am taking this arc reactor for myself but will sustain your life with a spell. The spell will cancel out if you get too far away so I would be wary of... rescue attempts,” Loki's smile was wicked, Tony wanted to punch it off his gaunt face, “While under my spell you will build a second device just for me, and once it is completed I will return your old device to you. Then you are free to go on your way.”

 

“You know the rest of the Avengers are coming for me, right? They aren't going to let you spirit me away,” Tony was starting to feel genuine fear, his heart beating too fast as Loki held the reactor just out of its cradle.

 

“Ah, I won't be 'spiriting you away', as you put it, you will inform them that you are going with me willingly and to call off their rescue attempts... or this could get very ugly very fast,” Loki was growling right up against Tony's face, was his breath smelling better? Tony wasn't in the right mind to tell and oh yeah _why the fuck did he care_?

 

What would Loki do if he didn't? Tony didn't need to ask, he'd rip out the arc reactor and take it for himself, leaving Tony to die. He sagged against the metal bonds, eyes on the dirt floor below his feet. Right now there wasn't a way out... but that didn't mean there wouldn't be later. Tony wouldn't find it if he was dead, “Alright,” he said, defeat thick in his voice, “Let me down and I'll call them off.”

 

Loki eyed him suspiciously before slowly sliding the arc reactor back into its cradle and locking it into place. For now. The metal around his arms and legs receded back into the wall and he fell to the ground with a short grunt. Tony's helmet had been tossed aside while Loki had been frantically stripping him so he crawled over to where it rested against the wall and slid it on without putting down the face plate. Loki was still giving him the evil eye and Tony thought it best to not push his luck right now.

 

With a slight adjustment the mic was back on, Tony heard yelling between his teammates before he said, “Hey guys!” His cheer painfully false.

 

Static silence and then, “Tony! Stark! Man of Iron!” All in a single cacophonous rush that made him wince, he was coming down with a headache.

 

“Yeah guys, it's me, look could you do me a favor and-”

 

“Tony we're almost to your location,” said Bruce, “Just give us a few more minutes-”

 

Tony felt a cold hand slide down over his shoulder, an unsubtle reminder that Loki stood right behind him and could kill him in less than a few more minutes, “No,” said Tony, quickly talking over the rush of sound, “I'm kind of in a jam here, I need you to turn around or Loki is going to straight up murder me.”

 

A cold thumb brushing along the pulsing vein in his neck made Tony shudder, “Get on with it, Stark,” whispered Loki against his cheek, arching over Tony's kneeling body.

 

“Is that Loki?” came Thor's voice in an indignant rush, “What is he doing to you, Stark?”

 

“Listen to me!” snapped Tony, starting to get annoyed, “If you come after me, I'll die! Turn back for godsakes and just...” he took in a shaky breath, “just trust me.”

 

Uncomfortable silence. Loki's hand was snaking down his chest, “Alright,” the hand paused just above the arc reactor, “alright Tony,” Steve sounded defeated and worried but Tony felt a bloom of relief as Loki's hand retreated. “We trust you.”

 

“Thank you,” said Tony in a single breath before the helmet was pulled off and tossed aside, “thank you...” he curled forward with a restrained scream. Tony put his hands over his face and felt a long finger brush down the back of his neck.

 

“Smart move, Tony Stark, now let's go... there is work to be done.” One arm wrapped around Tony's chest, pulling him up as if he weighed nothing.

 

“Fuck you,” said Tony. It was not often that he was cornered, there was always a way for Tony Stark to come out on top. Yet Loki had driven him back against the rocks. Tony's eyes opened as Loki hauled him to his feet, one arm wrapped securely around his waist. He may not know how to yet, but Tony was going to make Loki regret this.

 

With a whoosh of magic they were carried away, Tony's head spinning unpleasantly as his stomach lurched before his feet hit cobblestone. Loki dragged him through musty dark halls and into a mostly empty room that held only a bed and a small bedside table, “Whoa what the-” Tony tried to push Loki away but it was like shoving at a wall of bricks.

 

“Calm yourself, Stark,” said Loki disdainfully, tossing Tony onto the bed where magic curled around his wrists and ankles to hold him flat against the hard mattress, “It will be easier for you if you aren't moving when I remove your reactor.”

 

_What_ was with all this bondage? Loki you kinky son of a bitch. Tony tested the strength of the shining green bonds and only found them flexible enough for him to shift ever so slightly. “Just... be gentle, baby,” said Tony, trying to regain some semblance of control, “It's my first time.”

 

“Oh Stark,” said Loki, looking suave now that he was getting his way, “That tongue will get you into trouble..” his hand brushed down Tony's chest to click out the reactor, letting it sit loose in the cradle while his other hand lay flat just beside it. A strange warmth radiated through Tony, settling around his heart, “Ah... I see...” murmured Loki.

 

With one sharp yank the arc reactor was ripped from Tony's chest, “AAAHHG!” Tony strained against the ropes but they held easily and Loki's free hand was pressing over the empty cradle, shooting some kind of power right into it. Tony thrashed as pain shot through his limbs and his heart felt like it was about to beat right out of his chest.

 

Then it was done. Tony gasped for breath, looking down his chest to see the hole in his chest radiating a soft green light while his arc reactor was clutched in Loki's hand. He was covered in a cold sweat, the pain sat heavily in his muscles, fading to a dull throb that made Tony feel stiff and old.

 

“That wasn't so hard, now was it?” asked Loki, patting Tony over his new magical-whatever-the-hell before he turned an almost reverent gaze on the arc reactor which lit up his gaunt face with an eerie light.

 

 

“So... uh...” Tony looked around the room he was in, sitting up and rubbing his wrists as the green bonds disappeared into thin air, “Now what?”

 

Loki almost reluctantly turned his eyes away from the reactor, waving one hand nonchalantly so a roll of parchment and a quill—a fucking quill?--- was dropped down into Tony's lap, “Write down the equipment and supplies you need. If you know exactly where to get it then write that down too. Then you may rest until tomorrow... when you get to work.”

 

Tony pulled an old wooden bedside table over the stone floor with a wretched grinding noise that made him wince. He set out the parchment and began to scribble down all the necessary items, “You know some of these things can only be found in my labs,” said Tony, glancing at Loki from the corner of his eye.

 

“Then write that down,” Loki's voice was cold, the smile on his face a sharp warning.

 

Tony looked back at the paper, mind racing as he tried to figure out some way to trip Loki up. Nothing came to him, at least not yet. Perhaps after a bit of sleep. He finished the list and rolled it up before passing it to Loki who was holding the reactor flat against his temple as if it were a cold compress for a headache. Loki took the parchment before getting to his feet, “Rest, Stark,” he indicated the uncomfortable bed, “Tomorrow, one floor down and two doors right from the stairs, you will find a fully furnished workspace.”

 

Tony opened his mouth to say something glib (hey, it was all he had right now) when Loki got right into his personal space to bite out, “And if you try to fuck with me...” a cold hand settled on his chest.

 

Point taken.

 

Tony nodded and tried to give Loki a charming smile, but he wasn't feeling it. He was cold and worried and unsure of how to get his way out of this situation. Loki left and shut the heavy wooden door behind him, bathing Tony in darkness. The small slit in the wall, a window too small to crawl out of, let in a hint of moonlight. Loki hadn't locked the door, but what did it matter?

 

Tony had nowhere to go, and even if he did—he couldn't.

 


	2. I Keep Your Heart Close At Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki has things to get

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since this chapter is so short (and I am sorry for that) the next chapter will be up in 3-4 days instead of a whole week
> 
> Thanks for the bookmarks, kudos, subscriptions, and comments. I am happy that this story is being read!

 

Loki left Stark to his own devices, walking silently down the big empty halls of the abandoned castle to his weapons vault. Despite what others seemed to think, Loki was just as trained in the art of fighting as Thor was. Just because he favored magic didn't mean he couldn't kill with a sword. Loki wasn't after a sword today, nor whip, nor hammer. He pulled down one of his staffs, a gorgeous burnished gold with a curving sharp tip and a big open space in the middle of the blade. It had once held a magical gem, but Thor had smacked Loki so hard with his hammer that the damn thing had popped out and gotten lost.

 

He was now glad he'd kept the staff. Loki ran his magic through the staff, the head becoming pliable. When he pushed the arc reactor through the opening the metal closed around it tightly and was then surrounded by snaking bands of gold to keep it safe from harm. Loki did not understand the way the device worked, but he knew that the burrowing agony in his brain stopped when it was near. He could finally think clearly, his body responded the way it should, he no longer heard voices nor saw ghosts.

 

Loki pulled out Stark's list of supplies, over 90 percent of them were in his tower. They would be tricky to get, but not impossible. He saw that Stark doubted him, he thought Loki would be unable to get past his defenses. Oh, how little Stark understood. Loki smirked and tapped the tip of the blade against the wall, a wavering white portal springing from the tip. Walking through took him to the base of Stark tower, completely invisible. If he could hide from the all-seeing Heimdall then Stark's technology was nothing.

 

Loki didn't know his way around the building, but he had time to explore. He walked through walls and floors as if he were a ghost himself. Loki paused to watch people work, and in a high office he saw a red haired woman sniffing as she worked. Everyone in the building looked morose. Loki touched things with the tip of his staff whenever he found them and they disappeared. If he didn't know what something was he whispered questions in the worker's ears so they thought a co-worker had asked.

 

Bit by bit, piece by piece, Loki gathered Stark's supplies. Once he vanished an entire machine while people were using it. Loki couldn't help but grin at their cries of shock. His favorite sound in the world. Loki wandered through the halls until almost everything had been checked off of Stark's list. Loki stood in an empty hall tapping his finger against his lips as his eyes darted over the remaining items.

 

“Brother.”

 

A soft voice just behind him had Loki freezing up in place. Thor. But how?

 

“Brother?”

 

Loki turned around to see Thor standing in the hall staring hesitantly right through him. He knew he was there but couldn't see him. Loki started to inch away, not wanting to do any more magic close to Thor and tip him off to his exact location. Thor had always been too good at sensing when Loki was around. Damn him.

 

“Brother... Loki...” Thor let out a breath that carried the weight of the world, a hand brushing over his face, “I do not know what you are up to with Stark, but I beg you, release him. He is a good man. A man you would like if...”

 

_If we weren't enemies_ , thought Loki darkly.

 

“You need Stark, you need him if you are keeping him alive,” Loki was pressed tightly against the wall, very slowly working his way past him, holding his breath to avoid making any sound at all, “Come to me brother, let me help you.”

 

_As if you could, Thor_ , Loki scowled. Some tiny part of Loki wanted to believe Thor, wanted to trust the big oaf. It was only a tiny part though, easily ignored.

 

“Loki,” Loki paused briefly, looking at Thor as he finally slipped past his bulk, “don't hurt Tony Stark.”

 

Loki scoffed under his breath and ran off on silent feet. The only sound was Thor's mournful sigh behind him.

 

Aside from that the night passed without incident. Loki left the tower to find the rest of the supplies, sending it all back to his hideaway with a touch of his staff. It was almost relaxing in a way, being alone with this thoughts which were once again his. His eyes would dart over to the light of the arc reactor every few seconds, just to remind himself it was there. Soon he would have one of his own and then he would have time to figure out a... more permanent solution. As it was he was running out of time.

 

Running out of time. Something Loki never would have thought could happen to him of all people. By the time he returned to the castle the sun was beginning to rise. Loki walked through the echoing halls to Stark's quarters, peaking in to see him spread out over the bed with the ratty old blankets pulled up to his chin. Loki frowned as he noticed him shivering. Humans, Loki always forgot how weak they were.

 

With a wave of his hand heat descended into the blanket, weaving into the fibers like cloth of its own. In moments Stark ceased his infernal shaking and silenced. Loki left with a sound of disgust. How could he count so much on a human? They were weak and fickle, Stark most of all. Yet he had something Loki desperately needed. If Loki weren't half as smart he would have just killed Stark and kept this reactor as his own, but that would cause more problems then it would solve. Even Thor would never forgive him for murdering Stark and ripping out his arc reactor. Loki could not afford to have the world's superheros after his blood for Stark's death, not while he was so weak.

 

Loki walked to the rooms he had taken as his own, sitting down on the luxurious four poster bed. He didn't know when Stark would awake, but what did it matter? Stark had stayed put even while Loki was gone all night, and thank the norns for that or he'd have a dead Stark on his hands. Loki wasn't bluffing about the spell, it would kill Stark if he stepped out of bounds.

 

So he allowed himself to strip away his armor before sliding under the sheets. Even though he felt ridiculous for doing so he pushed the staff under the pillows so he was laying directly over the arc reactor. Loki could almost feel the hum beneath his head, a calm and soothing lullaby of sanity.

 

_He traveled. He was the traveler. He walked through darkness where no eyes could pry, felt his way through the forgotten paths. They took him to places no man or god had been since the Old Times. Since Before. Before what, he didn't know. It was not his job to always know. He knew what he needed to know._

 

_Most of the forgotten ways were empty, most of the places abandoned long ago. He would walk among the crumbling structures of what was once a civilization and it would whisper in his ear ancient secrets. They were never his destination, merely a way to an end. They made him impossible to find if he did not want to be found. They bred madness in those not prepared for them. Sometimes he brought people that needed to loosen their tongues and by the end of an hour they would tell him anything he wanted to know._

 

_It was easy to forget, however, that places were abandoned for a reason and that forgotten paths were not forgotten by all. It stood to reason that if he could avoid the eyes of others, then there were others that could avoid his._

 

_They found him in the dark and the quiet._

 

_A forgotten trail that was not as forgotten as he'd thought._


	3. A Mechanical Heart Built of Spare Parts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony checks out his new workshop and starts getting down to business

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a regular sized chapter so you guys get to wait a week again :D Hoohahahuahaa
> 
> Enjoy

Tony groaned and curled tighter into the pleasant warmth of the blanket. Who knew this ratty old thing could get so warm? He yawned and slowly opened his eyes, blearily looking up at the stone ceiling as soft morning light filtered through the thin little window. After being so well rested Tony actually felt quite a bit better. So he was trapped in a big old castle with crazy old Loki, forced to make him an arc reactor, with no real guarantee he'd make it out alive; so what?

 

Where there was a will there was a way. Tony threw back the blanket, hissed at the cold air, and immediately wrapped it around himself again. His clothes were still ripped all to hell from Loki's rough treatment last night. He needed new ones if he was going to get any work done at all. Tony tied the blanket in a knot around his shoulders so it would lay over him almost like a cloak, then pulled on his shoes and started to poke around the room.

 

There wasn't much to it, the bed with the little table and then through an opening across from him a bathroom that consisted of a hole in the ground with a wooden seat over it. Just fantastic, this place was so old it didn't even have real plumbing. Tony pissed down it anyway because when you had to go you had to go, never mind the cold air blowing up at him and making him shiver. He was not looking forward to taking a shit in here, that was for sure.

 

His hands were washed in a bucket of freezing water and dried on his perpetually warm blanket/cloak. Since it was pretty obvious that Loki had not left him any clothes Tony decided to get out and do some exploring. He was in a huge-ass castle! Who wouldn't explore? Tony peaked in each room as he passed them (all mostly empty, or if they weren't the furniture inside was destroyed), and wondered if Loki was back from his supply hunt yet.

 

At the end of the hall he softly pushed open the last door and was shocked to find it not only full of furniture, but _nice_ furniture at that. The cold stone was covered with thick luxurious carpets and a fireplace sat across from the enormous fourposter bed (not that there was a fire going, but still, it was the first fireplace Tony had seen here). A huge mahogany desk sat in the far corner covered in scrolls and books. A table beside it set up with what looked like a chemistry set, vials full of different colored liquids all lined up in a row. Then along the walls were bookshelves all crammed to bursting with books of all shapes and sizes.

 

Lumped up under a pile of thick blankets was probably Loki. How odd to see him sleeping. Tony could only see his black hair against the pillow, the rest of him curled down under the blankets. Poking out from under his pillow was the tip of... a spear? A staff? Tony couldn't tell. He was tempted to get a closer look (what if Loki drooled in his sleep?) but didn't want to wake the dragon, so to speak. On silent feet he backed away to continue the rest of his exploration.

 

Tony pulled the blanket closer as he walked down the stairs, why was it so damned cold in here? Would it kill Loki to invest in some heating? He decided to check out his work station while he was here, wondering idly if Loki had retrieved everything on the list. If he had Tony was going to have to think very seriously about his security and how to upgrade it to keep crazy unwanted gods out. The workstation had every little thing Tony had written on the list, even his fancy handmade espresso machine! Tony let out a bark of laughter and started to fix himself a cup, Loki had helpfully brought supplies.

 

One of the work benches even had stuff scattered over them, Loki had been taking things that people were still using. That probably hadn't gone over well. He sipped his hot espresso as he pulled forward a notebook filled with one of his worker's personal notes.

 

_Did you see the bossman today?_

 

**He looked tired today, didn't he?**

 

_I saw a woman leave the tower, she was hot_

 

**You're a pig, get back to work**

 

_[A crude drawing of a dick]_

 

**I hate you**

 

Tony snorted and shut the notebook, opening one of the drawers on the workstation to shove it in there. As much as he wanted to pry into the personal lives of his workers, this wasn't the time or place. Tony poked through, finding a pile of supplies on one of his favorite wooden workstations, some tools piled on another. Thoughts of further exploration were pushed aside as Tony began to organize his new lab to his liking.

 

The big things he couldn't move, but maybe Loki could. Tony wanted the work desks rearranged in a more helpful fashion, and some of the bigger machines shoved into different corners. In some ways he had power over Loki, he had the knowledge and ability that Loki craved so much. It was really just a matter of pushing his boundaries until he found out what Loki would and would not do. A delicate balancing game.

 

“Hey Blitzen, start moving things,” barked Tony the minute Loki walked into the room. He wasn't good at delicate balancing games.

 

“Excuse me?” asked Loki, tone colder than a Siberian blizzard.

 

Tony looked up from the plans he was sketching out, pointing out things with his pen, “That needs to get moved there, those things need to be switched, that big machine—no the other one--- needs to get put next to that workstation...”

 

Loki was gripping his staff so hard his knuckles were bloodless, “How dare you-”

 

“Hey!” Tony stood up straight, meeting Loki's furious gaze with his own resolute one. The trick here was to show no fear, to let Loki know that just because he was working on this arc reactor didn't mean Loki could push him around like a slave. “Do you want me to complete this arc reactor or not? If you want it done slow we could keep this mess at it is. If you want it done fast, you move shit. Got it?”

 

Tony wanted to hold his breath as the tension mounted, he wondered if he'd gone too far too fast. Loki looked mad enough to take his head clean off with one swing of his staff. Then Loki let out a sharp bark of laughter and the tension shattered like glass, leaving Tony's heart beating too fast. Without another word Loki began to rearrange the impromptu-lab with Tony's input. He picked up whole stations and machines as if they weighed little to nothing. _Asgardians_.

 

“Is this to your liking, Tony Stark?” asked Loki scathingly, but with a smirk on his thin lips, as he pushed the last machine into it's desired corner.

 

“Yeah, good job team, take five,” he said blithely, turning his attention back to his half-finished blue prints. Tony wondered if he could install a safeguard that would let him turn off the arc reactor remotely.

 

“Take five what?” Loki was right behind him, scaring Tony half to death.

 

“Jesus!” Tony put a hand to his chest and bent over the desk as he tried to keep his legs from giving out, “You need to...not... do that!” Thor did the exact same thing and it drove Tony right up the fucking wall.

 

Loki seemed unphased as he sat on the edge of the desk, watching Tony almost like a curious bird. A big black raven, perhaps, “What do you want me to take five of?” he asked again.

 

“It's just an expression,” said Tony, writing notes over his blueprints. He was used to explaining expressions to Thor, “It's like 'take five minutes' you know, 'take a break'.” Tony looked up from his work to see if Loki got it, but Loki's eyes were on his blueprints. Hey... Tony tried to cover them with his body as best he could but that would involve practically crawling onto the table so he merely picked them up and moved over to another table as if it was something he needed to do.

 

Loki taking an interest in the work made him nervous. He'd gotten away with making his first reactor and suit while captive because his jailors hadn't bothered to really check on him. Then when they did they didn't understand his work. Loki was smart though, way too smart. Just because the expression 'take five' confused him didn't mean he couldn't puzzle out blueprints. Suddenly installing safeguards and traps right under Loki's nose was looking much more difficult.

 

“Don't you have...villain things to be doing?” asked Tony as Loki didn't move from his spot on the other table, just watching Tony closely.

 

“You don't have any clothes,” said Loki, sliding off the table to walk over to Tony and invade his personal space by flipping back the blanket to look at his torn outfit.

 

“Yeah no shit, sherlock,” snapped Tony, trying to push Loki away. Goddammit how was he supposed to work in this environment?!

 

“Be careful of your tone, mortal,” hissed Loki right in his ear, hand curling around Tony's throat and pressing the knot in the blanket painfully against his adams apple.

 

“Yeah no shit...sir...” said Tony, grabbing Loki's wrist.

 

“Better,” Loki sounded amused. For some reason that annoyed Tony. He was released and Loki took a step back, “I will fetch you clothes, what else do you need?”

 

“An extra large extra meaty pizza and a big-ass stereo system with some rock and roll,” Tony laughed at his own joke, turning to see if Loki found it funny. Loki was already gone.

 

Whatever. Tony sang to himself obnoxiously for a bit as he worked but it wasn't the same without JARVIS. A lot wasn't the same without JARVIS. Tony kept catching himself trying to pull images off the paper or swinging his hand to bring up an hologram for dissection. It wasn't that he couldn't do things with the bare bones, it was just that he didn't really _like_ doing things without all his fancy toys.

 

Tony was adjusting one of his blueprints, still trying to change the design to fuck Loki over AFTER Tony had gotten out alive, when three boxes of steaming hot pizzes popped out of thin air to land stacked right beside Tony's head. It startled him so bad he sent his pencil ripping through his drafting paper.

 

The smell of the pizza quickly overcame any and all reservations as he pushed open the first box to see thick melted cheese, sausage, bacon, pepperoni, and all other kinds of meat piled high. Oh god. Tony wolfed down one piece so fast he barely even tasted it, the second a little slower, and finally he nibbled the third to savor it as he got back to work, smoothing down the slash in his page. If Loki had brought him pizza did that mean...

 

Rock music blared out of nowhere moments later, forcing Tony to slam his hands over his ears. Too loud. TOO LOUD! “TURN IT DOWN!” he yelled to the empty room, voice almost nonexistent over the sound AC/DC (how Loki figured out that was one of his favorite bands Tony didn't want to know). The music immediately went too quiet. Tony pulled his hands away hesitantly and murmured, “Er, a little louder?” The sound increased to a more comfortable decibel.

 

“Is it to your liking?” Loki appeared sitting on Tony's desk, giving him another heart attack.

 

“GOD!” _Asgardians_. “Yeah, yeah, it's fine... what did I tell you about jumping up on me?” Loki seemed to ignore his protests, a stack of clothes—his clothes--- were set down right in front of him, “So you really can just walk in and out of my tower like it's nothing?” Tony felt disgruntled and a little curious.

 

Loki made a little humming sound, grabbing up Tony's blueprints without his permission to look them over, “Why haven't you started building yet? Explain this to me.”

 

Tony grabbed back his plans and held them close to his chest, scowling at Loki for his blatant invasion of his privacy, “Do you want this done or not? Get out of here, I don't work well with others.”

 

If Tony didn't know any better he would have thought a hint of resentment flashed through Loki's green eyes, but it was so quickly covered by disgusted disdain that Tony was almost positive it had never been there at all, “I know how well you don't work with others,” sneered Loki, a clear shot at Tony's abilities with the Avengers. Loki disappeared before Tony could think of a witty comeback.

 

Now with some privacy, he took the time to change into a clean pair of clothes and forgot about Loki. Tony bobbed his head in time to the music, quickly figuring out he could change the volume in point increments. Before too long he had the perfect volume to work to (5 points louder, 6 points softer, 2 points louder). As he he wrote and rewrote his blueprints, tossing them to the floor with a frustrated noise as he continued to fail at finding a perfectly concealed trap, Tony wondered what his friends were doing. His hand crept up to touch the cradle for the reactor, where green energy now sat. When he touched it it made his fingers tingle until they went numb, and he quickly pulled his hand away. Tony didn't like this magic, he didn't trust it. Sure it was keeping him alive, but for how long? What were his boundaries? Tony realized he should have asked Loki that before chasing him off.

 

Tony grimaced and got back to work, he doubted he'd seen the last of Loki.

 

Most of his attention was drawn to his work, even while kidnapped by a crazy god he was unable to resist the siren song of a challenge. Tony tapped his pencil against his lips, staring down at his half finished design. Anything with radio control that he popped into the arc reactor would either: a) tip off Loki, or b) mess with the arc reactor's functionality. It needed to be functional so Loki wouldn't kill him for wasting his time.

 

Like a greyhound chasing a rabbit, Tony's thoughts circled each other in dizzying succession until he fell asleep with his head pillowed on a pile of rejected blueprints.

 

“ _So what's the deal with Loki?”_

 

“ _I do not understand-”_

 

“ _Come on, big guy, your brother is nuts! Why? Was he born like that?”_

 

“ _Have care how you speak about my brother!”_

 

“ _So that's a 'no'? Or a 'yes but it doesn't matter'?”_

 

“ _Loki has always been... Loki.”_

 

“ _What the hell is that supposed to mean?”_

 

“ _It means that for good or for ill, Loki's goal is Loki. If you're lucky his goal coincides with your own... and if you're not...”_

 

“ _Ah.”_

 

“ _It is wise not to cross my brother unnecessarily, we are lucky he is being so quiet.”_

 

“ _Cheers to that big man, cheers to that!”_

 

Tony woke up with a snort, sitting up with a pained groan. Blueprints stuck to the side of his face, he ripped them off and tossed them aside, wiping his cheek clean with his sleeve. God he was thirsty. Tony pushed himself away from the workbench to search every drawer and see if anyone had left their water in there. While he was digging through a drawer full of Playboys (he was going to have to have some talks when he got back) Tony got a sudden burst of inspiration. He was going about the sabotage all wrong!

 

His thirst all but forgotten he ran back to his blueprints and began to sketch. The issue was that he was trying to engineer something using already established techniques. What he _should_ have been doing was creating something inside the new arc reactor which he could then reverse engineer a control _after_ he was released. Even if Loki was somewhat familiar with science he would be unable to detect anything as controllable...because it wasn't yet; but it would be.

 

Tony felt positively giddy as he scarfed down some cold pizza, quickly finishing his design now that he knew what he was doing. His thirst returned with a vengeance (maybe eating more pizza hadn't been a great idea) as he was digging up the parts he needed for the new reactor. Tony's mouth felt like cotton as he carried a box of supplies to one of the other workstations, lips feeling cracked and sore as he licked them.

 

“Loki?” he asked hesitantly, setting the box down on the tabletop, “Hey, uh, some water would be nice?”

 

Nothing. Just the continued playing of rock music. Tony let out an irritated breath and took a step back from the table, he wasn't sure what he had expected. He supposed it was a relief that Loki couldn't hear everything he said when he said it. Well, Tony wasn't going to work parched. He grabbed up his blanket (still warm, he suspected witchcraft) and curled it around his shoulders like a very ugly wrap. It kept him toasty warm as he walked back out into the drafty castle hallways. Loki may not even still be here, and as far as Tony could tell there wasn't any running water in the whole damn castle. For fucksake his toilet was a hole in the ground.

 

Tony checked the rooms nearest to his little impromptu lab but they were all empty save for some old broken furniture. He knew where he should check first, he just didn't want to. What if Loki smote him for getting up in his business? That was assuming he was here at all. Tony trudged unwillingly up the stairs and down the hall to Loki's rooms. The door was open just a crack so when Tony knocked on it it slid open soundlessly to reveal an empty room.

 

So Loki wasn't here. Against all his better judgment Tony took a small step into the room, curious as to what a wanted villain would have sitting around in his personal sanctuary. The Persian carpets were thick beneath his feet, their geometric and fantastical design matching the colors of Loki's fourposter bed. Everything in the room was oddly bright, the carpets and bedspread covered in striking reds, blues, and yellows. Yet they were also majestic in their design, decorations of a man who considered himself royalty. Tony ran his hand over the duvet as he opened the draw to a small bedside table. There was nothing in it except a few scattered gold coins and rubies. Shiny but uninteresting. Feeling a little bit more bold Tony began to open books from Loki's shelves, staring at pictures of men and monsters, of fantastical beasts and otherworldly landscapes. A few that he opened seemed to be sketchbooks, had Loki drawn these things? Were these places he'd been, monsters he'd fought? Tony turned the page on a landscape made of craggy spires and endless moons to find a drawing of a wolf pup. Odd. He narrowed his eyes to get a closer look at it.

 

The brushstrokes were rough and scratchy, Loki (for Tony was positive this was Loki's work) had a distinct art style made of sharp lines and heavy contrast. The wolf had the sharp lines, but there was little contrast, he seemed to blend into the page as if he were fading straight off the paper.

 

“Fenrir.”

 

“I wasn't doing anything!” Tony slammed the book shut, struggled to get it back on the shelf, and then whirled to face Loki who was leaning casually in the doorway. The sketchbook fell to the floor with a thump that made Tony wince internally.

 

“Tsk,” Loki walked into the room, shoving Tony away as he bent down to pick up the sketchbook and open it back to the wolf sketch, “You were looking at Fenrir.”

 

“Uh, childhood pet of yours?” guessed Tony, sort of surprised that Loki wasn't screaming at him to get out.

 

“Son.” The book was slipped back into its place on the shelf.

 

“What?” Maybe he had misheard that.

 

“What are you doing in my rooms, Stark?” asked Loki, turning to lean nonchalantly back against the bookshelf. He had his arms crossed over his chest, the head of his staff resting near his temple. Loki's voice was calm but Tony picked up on the undercurrent of danger lurking just beneath.

 

“I was trying to find you, I need water... and, uh, I admit I got curious and started to snoop,” no point in lying about that.

 

“How far have you gotten in your work?” Loki was acting smooth, but Tony thought he heard a hint of desperation. Loki really _really_ wanted this thing to be done as fast as possible.

 

“I finished my blueprints and was about to start building but...” he let out a few pathetic dry coughs to highlight just how parched he was, “You do know you need to water me, or I'll never grow.”

 

Loki grimaced, whether from the bad joke or at the thought of having to keep Tony fed AND watered at the same time, Tony wasn't sure. Loki finally sighed and waved his hand, a tray with a clay pitcher and clay cup sat gracefully upon his spread fingers, “If you are good the pitcher will always be filled, if you are bad...” Loki's fingers snapped shut so the tray and everything on it folded and then puffed out of existence like smoke.

 

Point taken, but Tony wasn't going to let this one slide, “Hey,” he reached out and grabbed Loki by the wrist, forcing him to meet Tony's eye, “You want this fucking arc reactor? Quit trying to put me under your thumb more than you already have!” Tony lifted up his shirt to show the green magic now, somehow, keeping him alive, “You already have me, anything else you do will just slow down the process.”

 

Loki wrenched his wrist away from Tony with such violence that Tony was jerked forward against his chest, “Do not try my patience, mortal!” snarled Loki, grabbing Tony by the collar of his shirt before he could pull away, “You are lucky I do not chain you to your lab!”

 

“You _need_ me,” snapped Tony stubbornly.

 

“Loki needs no one!” There was a wildness in Loki's eyes that Tony didn't like, he noticed that the staff had slipped and now the reactor was sitting against the carpet. Loki looked like he was about to hit him, fist curling tighter in the collar of Tony's shirt. He ducked down, his shirt tearing as he lunched for the staff. Loki yowled like a wild cat, nails digging into Tony's shoulder as he scrabbled to tug him upright.

 

Tony curled his fingers around the cool metal and with a loud and painful sounding CRUNCH he slammed the glowing head of the staff against the side of Loki's head. There was a stunned silence, Tony was positive he was going to get killed right here and now, new arc reactor be damned. Instead Loki's fingers uncurled from Tony's shirt, stiff and hesitant as if he hadn't been aware of grabbing Tony in the first place.

 

The staff was gently plucked from Tony's grasp, Loki keeping the reactor close to his temple even as blood trickled down his jaw, “There is water in your rooms, and your lab,” said Loki, his voice strained but calm, “I think you should go.”

 

“Uh, yeah,” said Tony, shoving his shaking hands into the pockets of his jeans to keep Loki from noticing how freaked out he was, “Uh, sorry-”

 

“Go.”

 

Tony left and went straight down to his lab, feeling a new sense of urgency in his gut. How tenuous was Loki's hold on sanity? Tony didn't want to find out.


	4. I Barter My Heart for Pennies and Dimes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki pays an unwilling price

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now we're getting started! Sickness has slowed my writing output somewhat, fingers crossed you guys don't see the effects of it. All comments, kudos, bookmarks, and subscriptions are very much appreciated!

 

_Stark grabbed back his plans and held them close to his chest, scowling at Loki, “Do you want this done or not? Get out of here, I don't work well with others.”_

Loki snarled as he appeared back in his rooms, throwing his staff angrily onto the bed. How dare Tony Stark speak to him in such a disrespectful way! It was Loki's right to know that Stark was working as quickly as possible on his new arc reactor. A sharp pain in his temple had him doubling over, knees buckling with the agony so he was kneeling on his carpet. Loki swore, hands holding his head as if to keep it from exploding. It was getting worse, he could feel it getting worse! And so quickly... how much time did he have left? Would he be forced to keep the arc reactor against his temple for good?

 

He crawled over the floor, scrabbling up the side of the bed to grab the end of the staff and drag it down as he fell backwards. Sharp needles of pain traveled from his brain and down his spine, bringing tears to the corners of his eyes. Loki pulled the head of the staff closer and it was like being doused in ice water while stuck in a boiling hot room. Instant relief that had him gasping and shaking, lingering pain making his joints stiff.

 

The clock was ticking, while Stark worked on a temporary cure he had to find a permanent one... he couldn't live like this. Loki pushed himself to his feet and pulled down some books he had already read, but maybe they would hold an answer he had missed the first time around. Loki felt like he'd tried everything available to him, he'd tried spells, he'd tried potions, he had even stolen into the garden of Idunn and picked of her sacred golden apples. That had been his last resort, his fail-safe.

 

It had failed. Loki had been left reeling at the realization that whatever had gotten to him, and even now he did not know what it was just that it was killing him, it was immune to Asgard's most powerful medicine. That was when he had felt real fear.

 

Now the fear lived with him daily, a squirming rolling worm in his gut that tainted everything he felt, even anything he ate. All was tinged with the copper taste of fear. Loki did not let it control him, he accepted it, he tried not to feed it, he lived with it. His eyes scanned over the same line over and over again until he let out a snarl of frustration and tossed the ancient and valuable tome onto the carpet. Worthless! All of it worthless! He pressed the head of his staff against his temple and thought about joining Stark back in his lab, for some reason his presence was oddly soothing. Perhaps it was just having another person around, someone to distract him from him spiraling descent. Stark had made it clear that Loki was not welcome, and though he normally would have stayed just to bother him, he did not have the energy for it right now. Let Stark work in peace.

 

Loki was pulled from his dark musings when his wards gave a twinge, he recognized the signature and let the source through with a wave of his hand. There was a whoosh of flame and a tiny little demon holding a scroll appeared on his carpets, “My Master, the most evil, the most-hey!”

 

Having no patience for the demon's babbling Loki snatched he scroll right out of his tiny claws, “I know it's Mephisto, now shut up before I turn you into a carpet stain.” The demon hopped angrily (but silently) around Loki's calves as he read the message to himself.

 

_Dearest friend Loki,_

 

_I would not bother you but recently I acquired an item that I think would suit you well. I know if you found something that I wanted you would bring it to my attention. That is what friends do. Please come at your earliest convenience._

 

_Yours,_

 

_Mephisto_

 

Loki wanted to rip the scroll up and squash the little delivery demon under his heel, but Mephisto was too powerful to disregard, and Loki had to admit he was curious about what the demon had found. No one but Stark knew he was declining in health, and if Mephisto found out it would mean danger for Loki. He would have to tread very very carefully.

 

“What reply should I deliver to my Master?” asked the little demon, still looking disgruntled at the disrespect Loki was showing him.

 

“I will deliver a reply myself,” said Loki curtly, “Now get out.” He waved his hand and, like a rubber band, the wards shot the little demon out of this plane of existence and back where he had come from. Loki smiled to himself as he leaned on his staff, that had felt good; it was the little things in life. Loki thought about telling Stark that he was going to be gone, but decided against it. He had already proven that he wouldn't be leaving no matter where Loki was.

 

Loki took in a deep soothing breath, arc reactor pressed against his temple as he prepared himself for a meeting with Mephisto. Without a sound, without a single whisper of air, he disappeared. Mephisto's hell was not one of Loki's favorite places to be, but he never let it on. He arrived to find the tiny demon screeching and jumping up and down angrily as Mephisto sipped a drink from a goblet. He looked up as Loki entered the room, eyes lighting up wickedly, “Ah Loki, my little demon told me you would arrive.”

 

“I hope not too soon,” said Loki, giving Mephisto an elaborate bow by crossing one arm over his chest, “Your letter intrigued me, I could not for the life of me stay away a second longer.” Without being invited to do so Loki took a seat at the table, summoning himself a glass of dark red wine to sip as they spoke. Meetings with Mephisto were all about control.

 

Mephisto smiled and tipped his head, waving his hand so the little demon was whisked away before he could screech further, “How have you been doing, Loki?”

 

“I can't complain,” said Loki, taking a sip of wine, “But to business, I have much to attend to.”

 

“As do I,” said Mephisto, “I called you here to show you this,” he reached into a bag at his hip and pulled out what looked to be a pair of pince nez spectacles. The frames were gold, and the lenses were made of...not glass. Loki would need a closer look to determine exactly what they were made of. He gave Mephisto a questioning glance, wondering why the demon thought he would be so interested in a pair of glasses. “I see you have a question as to why you were called here for these,” smirked Mephisto and Loki stayed calm by picturing himself punching that smirk right off his red face. “These glasses don't help you see what can already be seen,” he said enigmatically, “They see what is not to be seen. You are a traveler Loki, far more than _I_ will ever be. What is there to be seen on forgotten highways and abandoned cities?”

 

The implication of these glasses hit Loki hard all at once, but perhaps not for the reasons Mephisto realized. With these glasses he could see what had infected him, he could discover their hidden plane and raze them from existence. If he was to go they would go out with him, he would go out in a blaze of righteous fury. Or from their existence he could divine a cure.

 

He had to have them.

 

Through all this his face remained impassive, as if he cared little for the artifact, “An interesting concept,” he said almost disdainfully, “However I could find a use for them...” Loki held out his hand for them, not actually expect Mephisto to just hand them over.

 

Predictably Mephisto pulled them back and waggled his finger at Loki as if he were a naughty child, “Let's talk deals.” Loki dreamed of the day he could take Mephisto on face-to-face and beat him into dust. That day may never come, and it had nothing to do with how powerful either of them were, the balance was too precarious in the world for Loki to knock Mephisto out. He was preferable to... the alternatives.

 

“What do you want in return?” asked Loki, feeling irritable. He shifted his staff to keep the head of it closer to his temple, soothing a growing headache.

 

“Impress me,” said Mephisto cheerily.

 

Loki was going to rip him open and stretch his guts out over the floor- “I could create a scroll of enormous power,” said Loki coolly. Mephisto looked unmoved. “I know of a land where you could expand your territory,” said Loki, thinking of one of the ancient abandoned worlds. Mephisto would abandon it no doubt, as it was inhospitable over a long period of time. Loki didn't want to give him anything that would allow Mephisto gain a foothold over him.

 

“No doubt there is a reason the land is empty,” said Mephisto, looking amused, “Keep trying.”

 

Loki wanted to scream. He needed those glasses. He _needed_ them! “A sword of the ancients. Perhaps I could tempt you with a potion which heals almost any wound? I have a globe which can see beyond the veil.”

 

Mephisto just tapped the glasses against his cheek, looking as if Loki was boring him. No no no no! These could be his only chance and he didn't have time to play this game! If Loki had time he would devise a cunning way for him to get the glasses while giving Mephisto nothing in return. He couldn't afford to do that.

 

“A ring which increases strength,” he was running out of ideas.

 

“Well, perhaps I can offer it to-”

 

“Tony Stark,” blurt out Loki.

 

Mephisto paused, his interest clearly piqued, “How could you get me the Iron Man? And what would _I_ do with him?”

 

“Ransom him, kill him, use him, I care not,” said Loki blithely, “I can get him to you.”

 

“Then do it,” said Mephisto, sitting back and crossing his arms over his chest.

 

“No,” said Loki, “I am using him right now, but when I am done with him he is yours. I will provide a way for you to get your hands on him.”

 

“Then you can have the glasses when you can get me Tony Stark.”

 

“No,” Loki snapped this time and the atmosphere in the room darkened considerably, tension thick and smothering, “The glasses now, Tony Stark later.”

 

“Oh... really need these, do you?” said Mephisto softly, glasses resting against his cheek.

 

Loki raised his brow imperially, “That is no concern of yours, and to have one of the greatest Avengers as your own should be trade enough. Do you not trust me?”

 

Mephisto laughed and if anything the tension increased. Loki's brain pounded in his skull, he didn't know how much longer he could do this. “Trust _you_? I trust you as much as you trust me, but I am intrigued by your offer... I need some collateral to assure me that you will follow through, that Tony Stark will be mine.”

 

Loki waved his hand so a scroll appeared before them, “I offer you... myself.” Mephisto's eyes lit up greedily, “If Tony Stark is not delivered to you after I am done with him then I am yours... to do with as you see fit.” Loki bit into his finger and then dipped the nib of his pen into the wound so he could sign the contract with a large loopy signature. His whole being rebelled against this, but Loki was rapidly losing his control. He couldn't stay down here much longer without Mephisto realizing that something was seriously wrong with him.

 

Besides, Loki did not care about Stark beyond what he could give him. What happened to the man after Loki released him was not his problem. Loki would uphold his end of the deal and return the arc reactor to his chest... after that...well... it was not Loki's concern. He rolled the contract up and held it out to Mephisto while his other hand opened for the glasses, “I hope this will suffice as collateral,” said Loki. His head screamed at him, the pain burrowing deeper and deeper.

 

Mephisto's pause seemed to stretch out for an age, but he finally reached out to grab up the scroll while his other hand dropped the glasses into Loki's palm, “It is always a pleasure to do business with you, Loki.”

 

“Likewise,” sneered Loki, in too much pain to humor Mephisto. He tucked the glasses into his tunic before getting to his feet, “Now if you will excuse me, something has disturbed my wards,” his bow was short and perfunctory and Loki left before he even had time to straighten up.

 

The disruption of his wards was caused by Stark walking into his rooms. Loki stood in the doorway just to watch him for a bit. He was thumbing through one of his sketchbooks, pausing at the drawing of his son. Loki leaned in the doorway, putting the staff against his head to sooth the pounding before he spoke up.

 

Yet the encounter did not go as he could hope. Such rage filled him. Such hatred. Whispered voices in his ears and they sounded even worse after Loki had pushed them away for a few days. Thank the norns Stark had hit him with the staff. He'd almost killed him, goddammit he was losing control.

 

How fast did the sand in this hourglass fall? Loki slid down the wall, one hand over his eyes as blood dripped down his temple and over his jaw; he didn't have the energy to heal himself right now. What he needed was rest, the meeting with Mephisto had drained him to his very core. Surely after sleep things would be back under control. Loki sighed as he kept the reactor against his temple, only after he felt able did he push himself to his feet and stumble to the bed. The glasses were set gently into his bedside table as Loki stripped from his leather and armor.

 

The staff was slid back under the pillows so Loki could lay right over the reactor. The hum was soothing, Loki passed out to the sound, and it even followed him into a thankfully dreamless sleep. The next morning he awoke feeling refreshed and was even able to wander around the room without the staff. No doubt when he was stressed his sickness took over faster. Loki spent some time meditating just to clear his system and prepare himself for the day, dealing with Stark would bring his stress back.

 

Once he felt centered and completely in control Loki grabbed up the staff and left the room. Stark was down in the workshop bent over one of the tables and completely absorbed into his work. He had junk spread out all around him as he used one of the nearby machines to carve something out of a metal block. Loki went unnoticed as he slid in closer until he was looking right over Stark's shoulder, “What are you doing?”

 

Stark swore and the machine he was using made an unpleasant grinding noise as the metal was jammed forward at an awkward angle, “Don't-! I-! FUCK!” Stark pulled the metal back then twisted and tossed it across the room, “You ruined the mold! What the HELL are you doing in here?!”

 

Loki frowned, thought about chastising Stark for his disrespectful tone, then decided against it. Stark was looking at him warily, which he had every right to do after last night. “I... apologize,” said Loki, walking over to the metal block and picking it up. It was warm to the touch still, and had been sawed halfway through. Loki ran his thumb over the errant cut, back and forth back and forth, like a mother cleaning dirt from a child's face.

 

With a hiss the cut filled in, metal shavings on Stark's table trembling and melting away as they returned to where they belonged. Loki set the repaired mold down next to Stark who was giving him a cautious look, “Thanks...” he said slowly, picking up the mold to turn it around in his hands as if checking to see if it was really fixed. “Handy stuff... magic,” he muttered, flipping the machine back on and continuing what he'd been doing.

 

“It is only another form of what you do,” said Loki idly, picking up various other items scattered around Stark to get a closer look at them.

 

“And what is it I do?” Stark sounded grumpy, but Loki ignored it. He didn't want to be alone with his growing madness.

 

“Create and destroy,” said Loki, gliding to the other side of Stark, his fingers brushing softly over his shoulders along the way, “build and break.”

 

Stark shivered and Loki caught him staring with narrowed eyes over his shoulder, “I think there's a difference between technology and magic, Rudolph.”

 

“Have it your way,” said Loki, in no mood to begin a philosophical debate. Normally he would punish Stark for speaking to him like that, but no, he had to avoid getting worked up. Calm. Placid. Sane. “Explain to me this Rudolph nickname,” said Loki, pushing himself up to sit on the edge of Stark's workbench.

 

“Don't you have anything better to do?” asked Stark, clearly exasperated. “When you forced me into servitude I wasn't expecting you to be such a chatty Cathy.”

 

Loki did have better things to do, but he didn't want to do them right now. Moving away from Stark meant finding whatever had attacked him... it meant searching fruitlessly for cures. For some spell or potion that would drive the sickness out. Stressful. Scary. Not what Loki wanted right now. He shifted to get more comfortable on the table, “No,” he said simply.

 

“Fine,” groused Stark, finishing the mold and blowing metal shavings off of it, “but if you're going to stay you're going to help.”

 

Loki curled his lip but nodded in agreement of the terms. Besides, Stark was less likely to double-cross him if he was right there helping him along. Stark seemed surprised by Loki's acquiesce to the demand for help, and that just made Loki smile. A Loki that was predictable was no Loki at all.

 

“Well... go over there and get that thing hot enough to melt metal,” said Stark, pointing to what looked like a big egg squatting in the corner of the room, “Then come back here.”

 

Stark's disrespectful tone had Loki warring between amusement and irritation. He was living only by Loki's will yet that didn't turn him to cowering or bending and scraping as others might. Loki could respect that. He bent down and stuck his hand into the hole in the contraption and with a snap of his fingers a fire grew in the coals below. Sorcery had the inside baking at a ridiculous temperature in no time and pretty soon Loki was forced to take a step back; extreme heat had never agreed with him.

 

“Alright now come hold the mold for me,” said Stark, not waiting for a reply before shoving the mold into Loki's hand, “Stand right there...no there... hold it like...” he gripped Loki's wrist and made sure the mold was held securely around the edge, “And when it's filled set it on the table to cool.”

 

“I am not a fool,” snapped Loki, ripping his wrist away from Stark, Loki did not like the way he was so generous with his touches. Stark should be afraid of touching him.

 

“Whoa, slow down there, I didn't say you were. So touchy.” Stark held up his hands and walked off while Loki fumed. His head throbbed slightly and he let out a breath, pressing the staff against his temple again, slowing down his breathing. Calm. Easy. It was fine.

 

Loki watched Stark with slightly narrowed eyes as he heat up a chunk of metal inside the oven, tapping his foot as he waited for it to melt. So he couldn't snarl at Stark, couldn't get overly angry with him. Loki held the mold silently as his thoughts turned over and over in his head. Stark didn't even react well to chastisement, it only seemed to encourage him.

 

“Okay hold it steady...” Stark's tongue was sticking out from between his lips in concentration as he brought the liquid metal over the mold and then started to pour very gently. When it was filled he nodded over to the nearest workbench where Loki was to set it down. Loki kept the mold so steady as he walked over that it were as if it were on a table already. He set it down gently then leaned over to get a look at it while Stark put away some tools in the corner.

 

“Oh... is it supposed to do that?” asked Loki, nose wrinkling as he stared into the mold.

 

“What? Do what?!” Stark hoofed it over to bend over the mold, hands on either side of the table, “What are-” With a small FOOMF liquid metal shot into the air as if from a spitting volcano, splattering over Stark's face and down his chest, “OH FUCKING CHRIST JESUS- FUCK-ING-!” Stark jumped back, hands slapping over his own face and chest.

 

“EheheheHEHEHEHAHAHAHA!” Loki couldn't not remember the last time he had laughed so hard. He crooked one arm on the table for support as his knees almost gave out, “The look on your face, Stark!”

 

“What... the... fuck...” Stark seemed to realize that whatever had splattered him wasn't burning at all as he wiped it off with a stunned look on his face. Priceless! Loki only laughed harder, back arching as he threw his head back and slapped a hand over his eyes, staff clattering to the floor. “You... motherfucker!” Stark didn't sound angry at all, Loki looked over to see him wiping more glowing slime from his face as his lips shook slightly, switching from a slightly manic grin to a frown, “You scared the crap out of me, almost literally I might add-”

 

“It was more than worth it,” Loki bent down to pick up his staff, wiping tears of mirth from his eyes with one arm. He walked over to Stark and crooked one arm around his chest, bending over from behind to murmur in his ear, “You, slapping yourself in the face, is an image I will take with me to Ragnarok.”

 

There was a heavy pause before Stark said, “Y-Yeah, playtime is over though, back to work!”


	5. A Hungry Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony is hungry, and things get a little tense

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man when are they just going to start fucking amirite? *canned laughter*
> 
> See you next Friday with a slightly more exciting chapter

 

Tony pulled away from Loki's grip, not sure how he should be feeling right now. Irritation and amusement shifted equally inside him. Thor had told the Avengers of his little brother's many pranks before he had become the villain he was today. It was one thing to hear about them, it was another to see one face-to-face; quite literally. Not only that but it had been the sort of prank Tony might pull on someone, and some part of him rebelled at the thought that he and Loki might share similar senses of humor.

 

“Okay, well, we'll do some wiring, just hold this like so... alright and let me worry about the rest.” Tony could have done this on his own, but Loki was behaving awfully well and it seemed to Tony that he was trying to avoid getting into a spat. So he let it slide, besides, it was nice to have him holding things still since Tony had forgotten to ask for clamps and none of the tables Loki had spirited away had them either.

 

It didn't take long before Tony was absorbed in the work, Loki all but disappearing as he tinkered with the inner workings of the new arc reactor. Who knew how much time had passed before Loki's soft voice broke through his shell of concentration, “Have you eaten yet today?”

 

“Huh?” Tony blinked, his skin feeling too small for him now that he was aware of his body again. The stuff Loki had sprayed him with was drying on his skin, flaking unpleasantly.

 

“I asked if you had eaten,” Loki sounded irritated at being asked to repeat the question.

 

Tony thought about it, carefully soldering a pair of wires, “No, I guess I haven't,” he said without concern. It wouldn't be the first time he'd gone without eating for a day. Tony's stomach chose at that moment to growl and clench, dammit this wouldn't be a problem if Loki hadn't brought it up! Now all he could think about was food. Tony set down his equipment with a sigh, “Well now that's you've said something you might as well feed me, and while you're at it I could use something to drink.”

 

“I gave you water,” snapped Loki, pointing to the cup and pitcher sitting on another table.

 

“Water is... fine and all for survival but I'm thinking of something with a little more... bite,” Tony wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, but that just got him a disdainful curl of the lip from Loki.

 

“Have you already finished all the pizza I got for you?”

 

“I don't want pizza,” Tony wiped his dirty hands off on his shirt before clapping Loki on the arm, feeling metal and leather beneath his fingers, “I was thinking more along the lines of burgers.”

 

“Burgers,” deadpanned Loki, shaking Tony off of him.

 

“Burgers,” repeated Tony resolutely, “A whole ton of them, and some scotch or something. Actually I think I'm done working for the moment, is there a TV in here? Maybe a shower? This stuff is sticking to my face,” Tony scratched at the itchy mess on his cheek.

 

“You have an awful lot of demands,” said Loki darkly, looking like he might wrap his fingers around Tony's neck and squeeze.

 

“Okay scratch the TV, but I do want burgers and alcohol and a shower. Heck, get enough burgers and alcohol for the both of us let's make a night of it!” Tony was a in a decent mood, he would have this arc reactor done in another few days and then he'd be free and clear to work on a way to shut it down remotely. It was almost intoxicating that he was doing it all under Loki's nose. Ha ha who was the smart one now?!

 

Loki was grinding his teeth, “What makes you think-ah!” He hissed and pressed the head of the staff against his temple. Tony froze, wondering if he should forget food and booze and just book it out of the room before Loki lunged at him.

 

“Are... you alright?” asked Tony, edging towards the door.

 

A pregnant pause, then, “You may bathe in my rooms, I will fetch food and... scotch.” Loki disappeared and only then did Tony let out a short breath. Whatever was wrong with Loki it got worse when he was agitated, which meant that they were stuck in a bit of a stale mate as far as antagonizing each other went. If Tony pushed too much then Loki would snap on him, and if Loki pushed too much Tony would snap on _him_ and worsen his condition. Tony gathered his clothes from his room and then shuffled into Loki's much nicer room. A small side bathroom that Tony had not had a chance to explore while snooping revealed a long copper tub already filled with steaming water.

 

Tony groaned with pleasure as he stripped out of his dirty clothes then sank into it until the water was up to his chin. He didn't know when Loki would be back, but hopefully he wouldn't mind Tony taking a little time to himself. The hot water sank into his sore muscles and back, loosening and soothing so well that Tony never wanted to get out. Loki might object to Tony taking up residence in his tub. With that thought Tony almost mournfully began to clean himself, scrubbing a soft green rag against his dirty skin.

 

No matter how much grit he washed off the water was never dirty, and no matter how long he sat it never grew cool. Magic was pretty neat. Tony washed his legs, idly picturing Loki laying in the tub doing the same thing, all long wet limbs. It was weird to think of Loki as someone who bathed, who slept, who laughed, who... feared. Yet Tony had either seen, or in the case of the fully furnished tub, seen evidence, of Loki doing all those things. Tony wasn't sure he liked it.

 

“Are you not done yet?”

 

Tony splashed and slipped along the bottom of the tub when Loki walked into the room to stare down at him, “Hey, a little privacy, please!” Tony grabbed the green rag and held it over his privates, “I don't barge in and stare at your dangly bits!”

 

“As if your cock would be of any interest to me,” sneered Loki, “I have food, hurry and get out.”

 

“Not of... any interest... at all?” Tony leaned over the edge of the tub and yelled out after Loki as he walked away, “Not even a little?!”

 

Loki waved a disdainful hand over his shoulder then disappeared from Tony's view. It wasn't that Tony wanted Loki touching his dingle-dangle (or _cock_ if you wanted to get vulgar about it), but he was vain and liked to know he was wanted. Not to mention it was fun to see where he could push Loki and what reactions he could get out of him. No point in being bored during captivity. Tony scrabbled out of the tub to quickly dry off, his aching belly propelling him until he was sliding on jeans over his wet legs and forgoing a shirt entirely. He was _hungry_.

 

Out in Loki's bedroom a table had been placed in the middle of the floor, and it was stacked high with burgers. Probably well over a hundred. Some looked like they were from McDonalds, others Burger King, one or two had Dairy Queen wrappers, and many more had to of been snatched away from small more independent burger joints. Tony smothered a laugh behind a few hard coughs as he pictured Loki flitting between burger restaurants like a Hamburgerler with a leather fetish.

 

There were also a few bottles of scotch next to the platters of burgers, one of which Loki was drinking out of like it was a water bottle, “Slow down there,” said Tony, taking a seat on the wooden bench attached to the table, “I don't want to deal with you drunk.” He rubbed his hands together and picked out some of the biggest juiciest burgers on the table, biting into the first with an appreciative groan.

 

“Please,” snapped Loki, sitting gracefully across from Tony, “This Midgardian piss isn't good enough to get the _children_ of Asgard drunk.” Loki picked through the burgers with a hint of distaste which made Tony wonder if he had ever eaten one before.

 

“Well _pardon me_ ,” said Tony, pulling over another bottle of scotch and pouring it into an actual glass, “But I'm going to enjoy some Midgardian piss.”

 

Scotch and burgers. Tony probably could have thought out this combination more. Loki nibbled at one burger and seemed to find it to his liking because by the time Tony had started on his second, Loki had devoured four. Tony paused in his meal to just watch Loki eat, it was like watching a starving man presented with food for the first time in weeks. Actually, it was exactly how Thor ate. Tony opened his mouth to offer this comparison up to Loki but the rarely used part of his brain in charge of censorship had him snapping his mouth shut again. Comparing Loki to Thor wasn't a great idea now that he thought about it.

 

Tony went back to his own food, stuffed after two burgers while Loki devoured platters of them and drank bottles of scotch whole. No wonder he had stolen such a huge amount. Tony sipped his drinks, getting delightfully buzzed as Loki ate his way through each platter, not so much getting full as running out of food. Loki seemed unbothered and just waved his hand to clear the empty bottles and dishes off the table.

 

“Uh, thanks for dinner,” said Tony, pouring himself another glass of scotch, “You have... quite an appetite.”

 

Loki gave him an inscrutable look before nodding slowly, “How much longer will this arc reactor take to build?” he asked.

 

To business then. Tony shrugged and took a drink, “Oh, I dunno, about three days give or take...maybe four.” He was starting to feel warm and sleepy, eyes growing heavy as he swayed slightly at the table.

 

“Mmm...that is... adequate, I suppose,” said Loki, sounding almost snotty.

 

Tony snorted and put one elbow on the table, sloshing some scotch over the side of his glass as he gestured towards Loki, “What's wrong with you anyway? Asgardian flu? Tapeworm?” Tony grinned even as Loki's face darkened in warning.

 

“That is no concern of yours, Tony Stark, just build the arc reactor and keep your nose out of my affairs,” Loki got to his feet, walking around the table to head to one of his bookshelves. Clearly his way of saying this conversation was over. Except Tony didn't want it to be over, he wanted to know.

 

“Hey,” Tony grabbed Loki by the back of his cape and tugged, “You kinda forced me into your affairs, the least you could do is tell me what the fuck is going on.”

 

Loki whirled around, yanking his cape out of Tony's fingers to snarl down at him, “You are drunk, Stark!”

 

“Doesn't mean it's not a good question!” Countered Tony, getting unsteadily to his feet, he swayed and placed on hand on Loki's chest to keep from falling over, “Look, making an arc reactor for _you_ is kinda a big deal for me, I deserve to know what the _fuck_ is going on.”

 

Loki's hand curled around Tony's wrist and he winced as he prepared to get tossed across the room... but Loki seemed to be thinking, just holding Tony's wrist and staring down into his eyes. It was a tense few moments where Tony almost forgot to breathe. Finally Loki let out a breath, cool fingers tightening ever so slightly, “I don't know.”

 

“Like fuck you don't-”

 

“I said I don't know!” Loki yelled right into his face and Tony shut his mouth with a snap, “There, are you happy? Does it _please_ you to know that the great Loki Laufeyson does not know the manner of his own _inevitable_ demise?!”

 

Loki's chest heaved, breath hissing between tightly clenched teeth, “It's not... inevitable,” muttered Tony, eyes dropping to where Loki's fingers curled around his wrist.

 

The tension in the air melted away, leaving nothing more than soul crushing weariness in its stead, “Perhaps,” said Loki softly, letting Tony go and gently pushing him away, “Now go.”

 

Gone. Tony felt oddly sober as he stumbled his way to his room. What could sneak up on Loki? He was the kind of villain that was always sneaking up on others. Tony sighed and flopped down in his musty uncomfortable bed, wrapping his blanket (didn't seem as warm as usual) around himself as he fell into less of a sleep and more of a drunken stupor.

 

It was the cold that woke him up... minutes... hours (?) later. Tony shivered and curled tighter within his blanket. The room was pitch black and freezing cold, clearly whatever enchantment Loki had placed on the blanket had worn off. Tony tossed and turned for a bit before letting out a sound of irritation and getting to his feet, “Ah-christ!” The cobblestones were insufferably cold on his bare feet, a burning sort of cold that had him hopping and jumping out of the room and down the hall just to try and keep his feet from freezing to the stone.

 

“Loki!” he hissed as he pushed open the wood door and finally stopped on the warm lush carpet just inside the room.

 

Loki was a lump under the blankets, a dark blur against a darker background. At night his oddly colorful room was transformed into one of blacks and greys. Tony clicked his tongue in thought as Loki didn't stir and took a few steps closer, “Hey! Loki! Come on wake up, I'm freezing!”

 

“Nng,” Loki shifted under the blankets, “Strk...”

 

“I'll get out of your hair if you do whatever you did to my blanket again,” Tony held up the blanket by the corners like a matador taunting a bull, “It's buttfuck cold in every room except this one.”

 

“Mmmnn,” Loki made a sleepy sound and slid one long graceful arm out from under the blankets to gesture his hand in Tony's general direction. A wave of heat whooshed over him, ruffling his sleep-matted hair and drying out his eyes unpleasantly.

 

The blanket was still cold.

 

“Oh come on!” whispered Tony, rubbing tears into his eyes so he could blink properly again, “Do it for real this time!”

 

“Uhg,” Loki shifted under the blankets and then settled with his back to Tony. It seemed he was too sleepy to try again. Tony was about to start swearing (he was a mix of drunk and hungover at this point) when Loki curled back the blankets on the other side of the bed and then went still. Maybe already falling asleep again. Tony wasn't sure what to do about this new development, he shuffled slightly on the carpet with the blanket clutched in his hands. Getting in bed with Loki seemed like the start of a really bad joke.

 

It was either that or freeze to death back in his room. Tony dropped his ratty old blanket and head around the bed to stare down at the open space. Loki's bed was huge, and Loki only took up a small fraction of it. He seemed to sleep in a tightly controlled manner, over 3/4ths of the big bed was open just for Tony. Tony sighed and looked up at the ceiling, what was his life becoming, before he slowly slid onto the bed and pulled the thick luxurious covers up to his nose. Loki's mattress was as close to sleeping on a cloud as Tony could imagine, and the sheets were all toasty warm.

 

Despite having a super villain a foot away from him, Tony fell asleep in less than a minute. It was an amazingly nice sleep too, Tony didn't dream and he didn't jolt awake. When he woke up the next morning he felt so refreshed that it took him a few seconds to remember that he wasn't at home but instead in the bed of Loki, who was laying half on top of him and breathing against the back of his neck.

 

Uh oh. Tony shifted slightly, trying to get out from Loki's heavy weight without waking him up. He was just glad they were both fully dressed, Loki seemed to sleep in some kind of tunic and soft pants while Tony was in his old sweats and ratty t-shirt. Tony just managed to get one leg out from under the blankets when Loki jerked above him and Tony found himself unceremoniously shoved off the bed with a yell.

 

“What are you doing in here?” snarled Loki, hair in disarray as he stared down at Tony hatefully.

 

“Whoa!” Tony put his palms up quickly, “You invited me in last night to keep me from freezing to death, awfully nice of you ac-”

 

“Silence,” spat Loki, “I invited you in?”

 

Tony opened his mouth, slowly shut it, and just nodded, hands still up. He could be saying all sorts of witty things right now, but antagonizing Loki was bad for the both of them.

 

“Hmmm...” Loki slowly sat back, “I don't remember doing that.” He rubbed the side of his head, tsking and pulling the staff out from under the pillows to press it against his head, “Well get out of here Stark and get back to work.” He let out a short cough, dark brows furrowing.

 

Tony picked himself up, brushing non-existent dust from his sweats, “Are you going to fix my blanket?”

 

Loki shot him a short glare, seemed too tired to keep it up, and just sighed, “Yes yes, when you return to bed tonight the enchantment will be renewed.”

 

“Okay...and...” Tony didn't want to push his luck, he really didn't. There was nothing he would love more than to go down to his workshop and lose himself in building the new arc reactor and get out of Loki's crazy hair. This was something he had to know though, “What about about this?” he tapped the hollow cradle in his chest where green light shone dimly through his shirt, “Is this going to wear out?”

 

Tony braced himself for more snapping but Loki's gaze was unreadable as he said, “That is different magic entirely... it will not fail you as long as I still draw breath.”

 

“Why? How does it work?” Tony's fingers lightly pushed the shirt down over the concave in his chest, then pulled them away as his fingers tingled.

 

“You would not understand anything I told you,” spat Loki, what little patience he had clearly running thin, “If you don't want to worry then get to work on the arc reactor and finish it!”

 

Tony didn't like that answer, but he also didn't like the way Loki's eyes were narrowing so he left the room. The hall outside was still cold so Tony ran back to his room to grab his shoes before making his way down to his workshop. He wondered if Loki was going to be joining him again. It was almost nice to have him there to order around, sort of like a snarly JARVIS. Tony missed JARVIS, he hadn't realized just how heavily he relied on the AI until it was gone.

 

Loki arrived about an hour later, he looked tightly drawn, gaunt face pulled into harsher lines by stress. Tony almost felt bad for him. Almost. Okay, maybe a little bad. Loki drifted over to his workbench, looking almost listlessly down at the work Tony was doing, “Are you here to help?” asked Tony, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible.

 

“I have somewhere to go,” said Loki, looking up from the mess of parts to stare at Tony eerily, “I do not know when I will return.”

 

“Oookaaay...” Tony looked back down at his work, unable to hold that haunted gaze for long, “Well...uh... be careful.”

 

Loki's tone was almost amused when he said, “I will be, Anthony Stark.”

 

Tony looked back up to see if Loki was smiling at him but the god had already disappeared.


	6. Heart Sick

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki goes to confront what he suspects is the cause of his illness... it does not go as he expects.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These last couple weeks have been really tough and busy so I am officially done with my buffer. I will try to build it up again before next Friday...
> 
> Anyway, thanks for reading! Tell your friends, make them read it too! Let them know there will be sex soon. Filthy, filthy sex.

 

Loki did not go far, just back to his rooms. He sat on the edge of the bed, staring down at his hands as he prepared himself for what he was about to do. It was reckless, more along the lines of something Thor would do, but Loki felt he had little choice. Surely some answer would be waiting for him where he'd been attacked... and now he had a new advantage. Loki opened his bedside drawer to pull out the glasses, hoping they were worth the exorbitant price Mephisto had set.

 

He slipped them into his tunic and then turned his eyes on the staff, a thought occurring to him all at once. What about the arc reactor? Would it survive in this other plane? This place of darkness and fear where the very air was thick and cloying? Loki's heart stuttered at the thought of the reactor breaking when he arrived, of the light flickering out and leaving him bereft in the darkness. To lose it so suddenly would be the end of him.

 

Loki had to leave it behind. He turned the staff over in his hands, the metal melting away to reveal the reactor in its entirety. As the metal retracted it popped free of the staff and into Loki's waiting hands. Loki turned it over between his fingers, staring into the soothing light, spots forming in his vision whenever he glanced away. Was it worth the risk? Leaving behind the arc reactor and then throwing himself into a dangerous situation?

 

Furthermore, should he die the magic in Stark's chest would cease, killing him as well. Loki set the arc reactor down gently on his bedside table, placing a weak illusion over it that would fade should he pass beyond the gates of Hel as more than a visitor. If Stark was lucky he would find the reactor in time, if he was not then Loki would see him in Hel.

 

With that done Loki saw no reason to tarry further, he pulled out the glasses and placed them slowly on the bridge of his nose. There were no hidden secrets in his own room, the weird material that served as the spectacles made it look like he was looking through a soap bubble. Loki grabbed up the empty staff and tapped it on the carpet where a black fissure appeared. He took a deep breath and dropped into the abyss.

 

Time was almost a foreign concept in lost spaces, Loki had tried to track it once before but found that what felt like a year on a forgotten path was merely three or four days back on Earth. Yet once what had felt like only mere minutes in darkness was a week on Earth. It was best not to think about the passing of time when traveling, it would only lead to madness. Loki's feet scuffed over dirt the color of blackened flesh, all around him was darkness, the only reality was the path. To take two steps to the side was to fall, to take two steps back was to fall; the only way was forward.

 

Loki looked around him as he walked, but this place was empty. Of course, there was nothing to guarantee the glasses even worked, or that Mephisto wasn't toying with him. Normally Loki would not be so rash, but these days he was always walking in darkness, knowing that any way but forward was death. Amazing how one takes advantage of the ability to pause and look back, not realizing it was there until it was gone.

 

At the end of the path was a door. A door quite unlike anything on Earth or Asgard but a door none-the-less. Loki felt a twinge of pain and pressed his fingers against his temple as the door shifted and swayed before him.. There was nothing behind him, he was only stalling. Loki pressed his staff through the door first before pushing his whole body through, grunting as it just barely parted enough to let him through.

 

Loki knew immediately that the glasses worked because what was once a vast empty plane was now squirming with long pasty worms that writhed through the air. Loki jumped back but the door was gone and he merely fell to the ground with a disgusted but strangled yell. The worms undulated and twisted among themselves like long skinny maggots, their mouths merely a circular row of razor sharp teeth. Each ranged in size from no longer than his pinky finger to the length of a car... or bigger. In the distance what appeared to be a mountain range shifted and curled in on itself with a vicious rumble.

 

The worms were twisting towards him, filling the air with their bodies and gnashing spinning teeth. Loki had seen much in his immortal life, but this ripped a scream from between his lips like nothing had in a very long time. He scrambled to his feet and slammed his heel into the dirt, sending a rush of flames in all directions. The worms incinerated around him, clearing a space that still had him feeling claustrophobic.

 

One of these things... _was inside him_? Loki retched, arm covering his mouth as his eyes watered with the pain beginning to radiate from his skull. All plans of revenge seemed to crumble under the sheer size and scope of these parasites' existence. Loki was powerful, but even he had his limits. A worm brushed against his side and then twisted to lunge straight for his face. Loki slashed it in half with his staff and that seemed to open the flood gates for worms poured upon him like water. Loki kept them barely at bay with fire, stumbling and running away as fast as he could as his head throbbed and his vision threatened to go out.

 

Was this to be the grave site of the great Loki Laufeyson? A land forgotten by all but worms, where no one would find him and no one would mourn. Not even Thor could find him here, not even the all-powerful Odin nor the all-seeing Heimdall.

 

“No no no NO NO NO NO!” Loki screamed, “I. WILL. NOT. _FALL_!” The world shook around him, the stars exploded before his eyes as fire and ice sprang from the ground at his feet. Loki back peddled, stumbled, and fell.

 

He fell. He fell. He fell.

 

Loki hit his own carpet with a grunt, the glasses flying from his face to skid over the ground and come to a rest at the foot of his desk. He had failed, he hadn't gotten a specimen, or even a sample of one. Loki screamed and slammed his fist against the ground, blood flaked his lips as he pushed himself to his feet, stumbling until he hit a bookcase which he grabbed and smashed onto the floor with a yell.

 

_Failure. Worthless. Dying. Dead. Kill. Be killed._

 

“AAAUUUGGGHHH!” Loki took a step only to have his shin catch on the fallen bookshelf, sending him crashing to the ground again. His head screamed louder than he did, the pain like hooks scrapping along his bones. Blood trickled from his nose and ears, bubbled from his mouth like bile. He pulled himself along the floor by his elbows, blinded by pain and made deaf by a continuous screaming. He wasn't sure if it was his anymore.

 

“Holy shit.”

 

The words penetrated the fog all at once, Loki looked up with narrowed eyes to see a shaking trembling mirage of Tony Stark wavering in his doorway, partly obscured by tears of agony. His belly lurched with a boiling hatred, which scared him because it wasn't his. Loki trembled and spat blood on his expensive carpet, “Flee, Stark!” he hissed, dragging himself to his knees as something inside him feverishly wished to dig his fingers into Stark's belly and rip him open.

 

“Hey man are you alright?” Stark actually took a step into the room, one hand held out hesitantly as if Loki were no more than a rabid dog. Foolish mortal!

 

“I SAID RUN, STARK!” Loki jerked forward even as he screamed in rage, fingers curling as if to grab Stark's ankles and drag him down.

 

Stark didn't stick around, jumping back and then running full tilt out of the doorway. The interruption brought enough of Loki back to know that he had to get the arc reactor. The journey between the foot of his bed and the bedside table seemed impossible. Loki crawled like a worm on his belly, unable to pull himself to his feet without his knees giving out and sending him crashing back to the floor. Loki smashed into the bedside table face first, hand reaching up to swipe over the top of it before he fell backwards. The arc reactor toppled to the floor and Loki managed to grab it up and press it against his head.

 

He waited for the voices and screaming to fade, for the splash of cold in the baking desert heat. Nothing. Oh god it wasn't-

 

_Kill kill die die!_

 

“NOOOOOOOO-!” The scream ripped from him like a scab, how could it not work?! Loki twisted with agony, keeping the reactor pressed against his head as he held himself, trying to will away the pain. His forehead pressed against the floor and more blood splattered from between his lips to stain his carpet. The voices roared in his head like wind through a canyon, cold and overpowering, making his stomach clench and tears leak from his eyes.

 

Loki shifted slightly, the room fading away until there was just the feeling of carpet under his knees in unending darkness. Then a splash of cold water; literally. Loki sputtered as the voices ceased with the finality of a door slamming shut, the pain fading to an aching throb through his whole body. He rubbed his arm over his eyes so he could open them to find Stark standing before him with a wooden bucket, panting as if he'd run a race.

 

“You're not going to rip my head off, are you?” asked Stark.

 

“I thought I told you to run,” said Loki, ignoring Stark's question. The reactor was working again, a soothing hum against his temple, keeping the monsters at bay.

 

Stark shrugged and relaxed slightly, placing the bucket down amongst the mess strewn about Loki's room, “Run where?” He pointedly tapped his chest over the now empty cradle where a weak green light shone through the fabric of his shirt.

 

“Your actions were foolish, you had no idea they would work! You could have gotten yourself killed!” Loki snapped, trying to rise to his feet to tower over Stark. The pain had settled in his bones though, and Loki collapsed to his knees with a frustrated cry.

 

Stark, the very nerve, had the audacity to shoot him an award-winning smile, “I have never been famous for _not_ taking action.”

 

Loki let out a disgruntled sound, hanging his head to mask a reluctant grin. He quickly schooled his features before looking back up, “Help me to the tub,” said Loki, in his haughtiest tone. He did not enjoy asking for help, but right now he was barely able to remain kneeling. Surely some warm water would do him a world of good.

 

“Yes, _your majesty_ ,” Stark's sarcasm was thick, but he still wrapped one arm around Loki to help pull him to his feet, “Christ, you weigh a ton!”

 

Loki wrapped one arm around Stark's shoulder, finding his touch not as disgusting as he once had. If anything it was comforting, grounding, and right now Loki almost wanted to drag him into the bath as well. Instead he sat on the edge of the tub, slowly stripping out of his armor while Stark stood around a little awkwardly.

 

“Maybe I should go?” Stark made as if to leave and Loki felt his belly clench instinctively.

 

“No!” He reached out and grabbed Stark by the arm, “Stay...” If Stark left the darkness could come back... thoughts of twisting writhing worms and the endless black abyss. Loki hated feeling like he needed someone, much less a Midgardian like Stark, but he was all Loki had right now.

 

Stark glanced between Loki's hand to his face, raising a single eyebrow, “If you insist... you can let me go now.” Loki let go of Stark as if he'd been burned, feeling both irritated and relieved. Loki stripped off his remaining clothes and then sank into the bath with a sigh, the warm water swirling around his flesh and relieving some of the stubborn ache in his muscles.

 

“Thank you... Stark,” said Loki, head resting against the back of the tub.

 

“Whoa! Thanks from the great and powerful Loki!” Stark slapped a hand against his forehead, “So who are you and what have you done with the real Loki?” Stark was grinning his self-satisfied grin, moving to kneel down beside the tub.

 

Loki felt a smirk slide unbidden over his face, reaching up with his free hand to grab Stark by the front of his shirt and jerk him so close their noses bumped, “Don't push your luck,” said Loki, eyes lidded with poorly contained exhaustion as he stared at Stark. Up close he could see every line on his face, the crows feet at the corner of his eyes, the wrinkle between his furrowed brow. Stark's eyes were darting back and forth, Loki was tempted to ask what he saw but instead pushed Stark back a little roughly, “How fairs your work on the new reactor?”

 

“Oof,” Stark caught himself on one arm and pushed himself back up, “Fine, mind if I ask _what the hell happened to you_?!”

 

Loki winced slightly as Stark's voice echoed about the small washroom, giving him a warning look. Stark just glared, fingers curling around the edge of the tub, “Fine,” sighed Loki, fingers flicking lightly at the warm water. It wouldn't hurt to tell Stark this, no point in hiding it really, “I discovered the cause of my sickness.”

 

“Whoa,” Stark sat up, clearly interested, “What was it, big guy?” He grinned as if he thought he was the funniest fucking man in the universe and said, “Was I right about the tapeworm-gck!”

 

Loki snarled and grabbed him by the throat, yanking him forward to hiss against his lips, “Make a quip like that again and I'll start breaking fingers!” He let go of Stark as his head throbbed in warning. Loki groaned and sank a little further in the water.

 

“Right, well,” Stark got to his feet, “I'm going to go then-”

 

Loki shot up and grabbed Stark's shirt, he couldn't leave! “Wait-”

 

Stark jerked away, looking a tad wary, “Hey, if you're just going to threaten and push me around, I have no reason to stay! So which is it going to be, Loki?” They stared at each other, Loki trying not to look as desperate as he felt. The worms were always just behind him, held at bay only by Stark's dubious company.

 

Loki let the word scrape over his tongue like sand, “Sorry...” he shifted in the tub to lean out further and curl his fingers back into Stark's shirt. There were some things more important to Loki than pride, and right now his tenuous hold on sanity was it.

 

Stark sighed and looked away, Loki's heart stuttering at the thought that he was going to try and leave anyway, did he know how hard it was for Loki to apologize!? Finally he turned to grin down at Loki cockily, “Alright, alright, just no more grabbing me by the throat... I can't wait to tell Thor I heard you say sorry.”

 

“Do not expect him to believe you,” said Loki coolly, reluctantly letting go of Stark's shirt, “I will explain what I saw... fetch me the glasses by my desk.”

 

Stark shrugged with relative good nature and wandered out of the room. The shadows stretched threateningly across the floor and Loki sank against the tub as they formed long writhing tendrils, reaching for him; wishing to burrow inside him. Then Stark entered the room again to sit on his knees by the tub, the glasses held lightly in one hand, and the shadows disappeared as if they had never been. “These went out of style approximately 200 hundred years ago,” said Stark with a smirk.

 

“They are not a fashion statement,” snapped Loki, “They show what is hidden, allow you to see what is unseen by others.” Some part of Loki rebelled at informing Stark about his experience, but another, larger, part had to keep him near. Besides, the price of the glasses was Stark himself, seemed only fair to inform him of their use.

 

“Huh... that's kind of neat,” Stark fiddled with the glasses briefly before popping them straight onto his face to stare at Loki shamelessly, “Oh my god!”

 

“What?!” Loki went stiff, picturing his body crawling with worms. Stark was staring open mouthed at his chest, was a worm burrowing through his flesh even now?!

 

“I can see your heart!” Stark slapped Loki on the chest with a splash of water before laughing right in his face.

 

Loki felt a flash of rage born from fear, hand darting out of the water to slap Stark so hard he crashed to the ground with a yell. As soon as it had come it was gone, and Loki just felt hollow. It had only been a joke. Stark was gasping on the ground, one hand held over his cheek as he clearly tried to put himself back together. Loki sat up and gracefully pushed himself out of the tub, letting the cool air caress his naked body. Stark glared up at him, a black eye already beginning to form. Loki bent down and snatched up the glasses, placing them on his face as he sat on the edge of the tub, staring down at Stark almost severly.

 

“And what do you see?” snapped Stark, “If it's going to be a heart quip you should know I've heard it before... and took it better than you did.”

 

Loki cleared his throat, feeling faint guilt squirm in his belly, “I see common sense,” Loki fussily adjusted the glasses, breath almost held as he waited for Stark to react.

 

Stark stared at him open mouthed and then let out a short bark of laughter, “Bruce was right, you are a bag of cats...” he pushed himself to his feet, standing so close to Loki that he could feel Stark's body heat against his cool flesh. “So you can see things that can't be seen... what was hidden from you?”

 

The glasses were removed slowly as Loki stalled for even a moment more of time, “Worms,” he whispered after a short silence.

 

“W-...oh...” something dawned on Stark's face as he looked at Loki, eyes darting over his face, “Hey...” he reached up to rest his hand on Loki's arm, “You viciously kidnapped the right guy, leave things to Tony Stark!”

 

Loki glanced at the hand, almost hot on his skin, then back to Stark who was looking far too sure of himself while his face was bruising. Loki gently brushed the backs of his fingers down Stark's cheek, the bruise and black eye fading away before they really had time to set in. What a strange mortal, always so assured, cocky...but for good reason. Smart and brave enough to stand toe-to-toe with Loki even when he was at his worst. Without thinking about it his fingers continued to trace Stark's face, over the wrinkles and small scars, brushing his well trimmed beard that was beginning to look a little un-groomed.

 

There was no man like Tony Stark anywhere else in all the worlds, of that Loki was quite sure. No Asgardian nor mortal could match him. Loki was pulled from his revere when Stark cleared his throat and he found himself so close to Stark's face that their foreheads nearly touched. “You, ah, should get dressed. You just parading around naked is distracting.”

 

Loki frowned and looked down at himself, he hadn't thought about his nudity. On Asgard being naked was of little consequence... but here on Midgard things were different. He let go of Stark and padded out of the little room to look at the wretched mess left behind by his... attack. Loki waved his hand and the shelves and books wobbled on the floor but did nothing more. Loki made a sound of frustration and tried again, putting more force than necessary into the action only to have one shelf fly across the room and shatter into a thousand pieces. Before Loki could lose himself he felt a familiar vibration pressed against his temple, Stark had retrieved the arc reactor from the bathroom and pressed it against his head.

 

“I think you should get dressed and just... head to bed, try again in the morning before you make it all worse.”

 

Loki growled, looking at his own hands as if they had betrayed him, “What is happening to my magic?”

 

“Heeey, it's just fatigue!” said Stark, but Loki was well versed in lies and sensed the hesitation in Stark's tone, “Put on some damned pants and crawl in bed!”

 

Perhaps... perhaps it was just fatigue, Loki felt exhausted to his very core. What good was being a master of lies if he could not lie to himself? Loki nodded slowly, taking the reactor from Stark as he carefully walked to his wardrobe, trying to avoid shards of wood. Loki slid on a pair of loose pants, feeling as if he were in a dream. Stark was picking up books and moving them aside to make a path around Loki's bed, “Stay with me,” said Loki, feeling slightly out of body. Stark paused, face hidden as he was bent over a book on the carpet. A second felt like an age. Loki whispered, “Please.”

 

Another age passed, Stark stood up straight looking reluctant, “I have more work to do-”

 

Loki sagged, stumbling over to the bed to support his weight on the mattress before he collapsed. He was tired, his magic failed him, the parasites within him pulled him closer to death with every day that passed. Now that he knew their shape it was somehow worse, and he did not want to be alone. The urge for company felt more important than Stark's important work on the new reactor, “Stark...”

 

He did not dare look as he heard shuffling, positive that Stark was walking out of the room. Instead he felt Stark's calloused hand on his shoulder, “Alright I'll stay... Thor never told me you could work the puppy eyes.”

 

Loki almost sobbed with relief, not alone not alone. Oh thank the norns. Perhaps he would sleep without nightmares. Too tired to speak further Loki just crawled into bed, shoulders heavy with the knowledge that he was running out of options and the sand trickled ever faster through his broken hourglass. Without being told Stark went around to the other side, stripping off his clothes as he went until he was in just his undergarments, a pair of black shorts.

 

There was nothing but silence as Loki placed the arc reactor beneath his pillow, the hum his lullaby. Stark's breath was soft beside him, and though they did not touch just knowing he was not alone was enough to let Loki shut his eyes and not fear the darkness that sleep brought.


	7. Crazy Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony makes a lucky discovery, realizes the clock is ticking, and makes some questionable decisions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HA HA FINISHED IT RIGHT BEFORE I HAVE TO LEAVE FOR THE WEEKEND! Busy busy week (my birthday was on Tuesday!) but I still managed to somehow keep my deadline.
> 
> If I miss a deadline, or know I'll miss a deadline, I'll announce it on my tumblr- ohgodsalazarwhy
> 
> And yes, there is hip bumpin' in this chapter (that means sex)
> 
> I am running out of heart related titles. Why did I do this to myself.

 

Tony hardly slept at all. Sure, he dozed in and out, but the knowledge that Loki, who just hours ago had trashed his room and was coughing blood all over the place, was sleeping right next to him was a little disturbing. And what was with earlier in the bath? One minute Loki is slapping him in the face and the next looking like he was about to kiss him. Tony turned his head to watch Loki sleep, pale face barely visible in the darkness of his room. The worst part was that Tony had been contemplating closing the distance. Could he be blamed? Loki was smokin' hot, in a wiry sort of way, and Tony had been watching him pad around naked, a thick cock sitting between his legs that Tony _kind_ of wanted to touch just to feel the weight of it in his palm.

 

What was he thinking? Loki was an insane villain, _literally insane_. Though he looked peaceful in his sleep, dark lashes shadowed against his cheeks, and thin lips parted ever so slightly for shallow breaths. Tony hesitantly reached forward to touch Loki's cheek, feeling the smooth skin beneath his calloused fingertips. Loki shifted, turning his head into the touch without waking. There was more to Loki than gross megalomania... there was terror, rage, and an all encompassing need. Thor had always come off as the more emotional Asgardian, for godsake when he was upset it started to storm around the tower.

 

Yet Thor was also rational, kind, and intelligent. He thought through problems (most of the time, but sometimes he did let his emotions rule his actions). Loki was pure emotion, all the time. It was exhausting to try and keep up with him. One minute he was about to break Tony in half and the next he was _pleading_ with him to stay. Tony pulled his hand back and Loki's breath hitched at the loss, but he did not wake. He could slip the arc reactor out from under the pillow right now, mused Tony as Loki rolled over so his naked back was to him. He could push it back into his chest and be gone before Loki even woke up.

 

Then what? Leaving Loki to die here? Thor would be furious, he loved his brother as much as he hated him. Tony brushed back Loki's hair so he could see the sharp line of his jaw, fingers trailing down his throat. He wasn't that kind of guy anyway, Tony Stark didn't just leave people to die if he could help them, even crazy psychopaths like Loki. Though how he was going to help Loki was another matter _entirely_.

 

At some point Tony passed out, though it had to of been close to dawn. He didn't feel rested when his eyes opened again, and Loki had taken the opportunity to roll on top of him while he slept. Goddammit. Tony shifted with a small grunt, one hand resting on Loki's shoulder as he gently tried to roll him away. Unlike last time Loki had rolled on top of him, and oh how long ago that had seemed, the issue this time was that Tony... kind of liked it. It was his sex-deprived body talking, telling him he had a gorgeous man laying on top of him that he had almost made out with last night, so why not enjoy it?

 

Tony shifted further to the edge of the bed and told himself over and over, _you never stick your dick in crazy, you never stick your dick in crazy_. What if crazy stuck its dick in you... did that still count? Loki's warm breath stuttered against his neck and long wiry arms wrapped around Tony to pull him close again. Operation: Slink Away had failed. Tony tried to feel more beat up about it. There was something alluring about Loki when he wasn't coughing up blood and trying to rip Tony's head off. Something he'd seen last night when Loki had been walking around naked and talking to Tony almost as an equal. It was weird, Tony wasn't sure he liked it... it was a lot harder to tell himself that once this was all over he could go back to kicking Loki's ass on the battlefield.

 

Loki shifted to nuzzle against Tony's neck and Tony decided it was time to get out of bed _now_. “Loki,” he hissed, “hey... I... gotta piss like a racehorse... come on, man!” Tony tapped Loki on the cheek a few times. Now that he thought about it he did have to pee. Loki grumbled, brow furrowing as he was pulled from sleep. Tony shook him again until green eyes were finally looking down at him, slitted from exhaustion. “Sorry,” said Tony, actually meaning it for once, “but I have to get up and get back to work.”

 

Loki growled and for a moment Tony thought he wasn't going to move, but with a tired sigh Loki rolled away from Tony and seemed to go back to sleep. Tony was left staring at the fourposter above him and wondering why he had the stupid urge to kiss Loki silly. Right, time to get out of _here_. Tony rolled out of bed, gathering up his clothes and sliding them back on before he left. Hopefully Loki was in the right state of mind to even be left alone. He seemed much better, and Tony doubted he would have even let him go if he didn't feel up to it.

 

He picked his way through shattered wood and strewn books left from last night's debacle the ran to his room to relieve his aching bladder. Tony was positive he could have the arc reactor done soon, if not tomorrow then the day after. He'd lost some time last night but that was alright. Yet getting the reactor finished didn't solve the problem, it obviously wasn't curing Loki. If anything the effect of it was starting to wear off. Tony pondered this conundrum as he padded down to his lab which was strewn with half-laid pipes in preparation for the final step. He was working on the finer details of his reactor sabotage, which had lost some of it's delicious flare after last night. It still had to be done, Tony could not afford to have two of these arc reactors around, much less one of them with Loki.

 

Tony looked around the messy lab, hands on his hips as he surveyed the various tables. Before the sound of screaming had pulled him from his work he'd been busy crafting the tiny chip he was to use for the sabotage. Actually to be more precise, he'd been looking for a tool set. Tony had already checked the first three workstations and found little else but notebooks, tools he didn't need, and food left there by employees. Tony was thinking very seriously about having a meeting detailing why tools should be kept in their proper drawers.

 

He stepped over a pile of pipes to get the fourth workstation, rifling through the big bottom drawers and wondering if he was going to have to just improvise the tool. It would take more time and might lose him day fabricating. Tony moved up to the upper drawer and pulled it open, shifting through broken pencils, notepads and- “Holy shit!” Someone had left their Starkphone in here! Tony thought he could hear angels singing from on high as he reverently pulled the phone out and turned it on. It even had full battery. He could not believe his luck.

 

Time to see if he could reach Steve. Tony ran from the lab up to his current crappy rooms, shoving his body out the window as much as possible to get a good signal outside of the heavy stone walls. Tony was so excited he hardly even noticed the discomfort of jamming his torso through a tiny window. He quickly dialed straight to JARVIS.

 

“JARVIS, buddy,” said Tony as soon as the connection was made, “I need you to hook me up to Steve.”

 

“Yes, sir.”

 

Good ol' JARVIS. Tony held the phone out and turned on speaker phone as a familiar voice rang out into the open air, “Tony? JARVIS said you're calling. How?! Are you okay? We can hope in the jet and be there in no time to get you if-”

 

“Steve give a guy some time to talk,” Tony grinned as Steve let out a disgruntled sound, “You can't come in and rescue me yet, Prince Charming, Loki still has a spell on me leashing me to the area... but I found a phone and thought I'd see if it works.”

 

“Is Loki torturing you? What does he want?” Steve sounded both worried and stern.

 

“Nah, no torture,” said Tony, knowing Steve may not even believe him, “he's having me build an arc reactor for him.” Tony paused and then got serious, “Steve, he's dying.”

 

“Who? _Loki_?”

 

“Yeah,” Tony let out a breath, he couldn't believe he was about to say this, “next time I call don't even take the time to answer. Jump in the jet and track me down, make sure Thor and Bruce are there-”

 

“Tony what-”

 

Tony talked over him, “ _He's dying_ , Steve! He may be one crazy sonuvabitch but-” Tony almost said that _he_ didn't want to see Loki die but quickly filled in his stutter with, “-Thor doesn't want him dead.”

 

Silence over the line. Then Steve spoke up like a true hero, “You got it, Tony, we'll be ready... anything we should prepare? What's wrong with him, I can ask around with the others to think up solutions.”

 

“There's... worms... in his brain or something,” said Tony, wrinkling his nose with distaste and regretting every tapeworm joke he'd made.

 

“ _What_?”

 

“You heard me, I don't have a ton of time to talk so just... be ready for my call, if it happens,” who knew, maybe Loki would find a cure on his own. “Don't worry Cap, I'll make it out, I always do.”

 

Steve let out an exasperated sigh, “That doesn't mean you should push your luck, don't do anything you'll regret, Tony.”

 

“I wouldn't be Tony Stark if I didn't,” said Tony cheekily. He hung up the phone before Steve could protest, staring at the menu for a few short moments before pressing his luck and dialing another number.

 

“Pepper Potts-”

 

“Hey Pep,” Tony was absurdly glad to hear her voice. They may have broken up but he still cared for her deeply, she always managed to keep him together like no one else could. Predictably there was shocked silence and then Pepper was going off on him about being so reckless and if he'd listened to Cap and waited none of this would have happened. “Good to hear you too, Pepper, how is the company holding up?”

 

“I'm doing what I can Tony, but having you whisked away by a super villain isn't exactly great for stocks!” Her voice lowered and Tony heard just how worried she was when she asked, “Are you okay?”

 

“I'm fine,” Tony reassured, looking out over the misty fields beyond the castle, “it's going to be okay, Pepper... just hold down the fort like you always do and I'll be back to get in your hair and drive you crazy as soon as I can.”

 

“You had better, Tony,” said Pepper, and though her voice wavered slightly Tony heard nothing but steel in her tone.

 

“Bye, Pep,” Tony hung up the phone and pulled himself back through the window to sit heavily on the old bed. What the hell was he doing? He owed Loki nothing, yet here he was dragging the rest of the Avengers into it; because if there was one thing Tony understood by now, it was that he couldn't handle Loki alone. For godsake, _Loki_ couldn't handle Loki alone.

 

Enough thinking, time to jump back into the fray. Tony shoved the Starkphone under the crappy mattress to keep it safe, not planning to use it again except for in an emergency. Tony left the room for his workshop, taking a seat at his unfinished reactor before realizing he never HAD found those tools. He swore and stormed off to start fabricating.

 

Loki joined him a few hours later looking groomed and in control, if a little weary. Tony didn't question his presence, instead sending him straight to work setting up the pipes for the final step. Every few moments a painful sounding cough would erupt from Loki, making Tony jump where he sat at the saw, feeding through a sheet of metal. After a third sheet had almost been ruined Tony switched off the saw and spun around on his stool, lifting up his goggles to give Loki a piercing look, “Alright, do you have some cough drops or something?”

 

Loki glared, coughed, and snapped out, “Excuse you, Stark?”

 

“Seriously, what's wrong with you?” Tony slid off the stool to walk over to Loki, gripping his chin and forcing open his mouth to shine a pen light down his throat. Loki slapped him away with an indignant hiss. “Spill it,” said Tony, knowing this had to be something more than brain worms. He needed all the information if he was going to find a way to help Loki. He crossed his arms over his chest and tried to look as serious as possible, completely aware he was trying to give a “dad-stare” to Loki of all people.

 

Loki wiped his lips with the back of his hand, he looked disgruntled at being called out, “I merely tried something new this morning.”

 

“Was it swallowing broken glass? Because that's what it sounds like!” Tony reached out to grip Loki's arms, staring up into his green eyes. Tony always forgot just how tall Loki was, he did not have Thor's bulk, yet they had to be close to the same height.

 

Loki pushed him back, though he was surprisingly gentle when doing so, “It was a potion... it may have-” a coughing fit that had a fine mist of blood spraying over Tony's face, “-unintended consequences.”

 

“Oh- _gross_!” Tony wiped his sleeve over his face, “Cover your mouth when you cough!”

 

Loki had the grace to look a bit guilty, “I'm running out of options, Stark, this potion keeps my mind as my own, in conjunction with the reactor.” Mixing magic and science, Tony wasn't sure how well that would work. It did make it clear that Loki was aware that the reactor was beginning to fail him. “Now get back to work, Stark, and cease your idle prattle.”

 

Tony could not believe the nerve of Loki, ordering him around like a servant. “I swear to stop my idle prattle,” said Tony with a grin, making his crossed fingers fairly obvious. Loki looked at his fingers and back to him, and then turned on his heel to keep laying pipes. “For your information crossed fingers means I will do the opposite of that!” Loki waved over his shoulder and Tony threw up his hands in exasperation, going back to his sheets of metal. While his hands worked automatically his brain was far away, thinking of real solutions, not these stop-gaps Loki seemed stuck on. Magic didn't seem to do anything, the arc reactor worked... but for how much longer Tony wasn't sure. The potion worked, but it seemed to make Loki sick. Tony turned off his saw and sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose as he came up with blanks. Maybe Bruce was having a better time thinking of solutions, but right here and now that was useless.

 

“What are you thinking about?” Loki's voice curled around him like a snake, binding him tight then hissing in his ear.

 

Tony started and turned on his stool, feeling boxed in by Loki's unexpected proximity. He wanted to ask why the fuck Loki would care, but thought better of it when he saw the exhaustion in Loki's eyes. “How to help you,” said Tony honestly, leaning his elbows on the desk behind him, “a more permanent solution.” Loki coughed into his elbow, giving Tony an incredulous look, “You think I was just kidding last night?” asked Tony, feeling a tad disgruntled that Loki doubted him.

 

“I could have killed you,” said Loki, wiping his mouth and smearing blood across his cheek, “you would have said anything.”

 

“Loki-” Tony's serious words of encouragement were drowned out by a renewed coughing fit, and if the look on Loki's face was anything to go by, it was both unexpected and uncontrollable. Tony jumped away as Loki lurched forward to rest his palms on the edge of the workstation, hacking blood and phlegm all over Tony's newly cut metal tools. Oh jesus _christ_! Loki gagged and spat around his coughing, taking in shallow watery breaths whenever he got the chance.

 

Tony ran straight for the never ending pitcher of water, snatching it up and taking it over to Loki who was now on his knees hyperventilating, “I don't think the potion you took is FDAA approved,” said Tony, having to yell over the sound of Loki's coughing. He put a soothing hand on the back of Loki's neck, tangling his fingers in long black hair so he could tip Loki's head back and press the pitcher against his lips. Tony had never considered himself the kind of guy who could take care of a sick person...and that was proven true when any water Loki managed to drink was sprayed forcefully out his mouth and nose as he choked and coughed some more.

 

_Now_ what? Loki almost sounded like he was screaming between each painful hack, but he could never get in enough breath to do more than wheeze. Oh god, was the potion wearing off? If it was then Loki could lose his mind... where was the arc reactor? Tony's eyes darted around the room and found the glowing staff laying on the cobblestones by the pipes Loki had been setting up. He squeezed the back of Loki's neck, as reassuring as he could get, and tried to get up and run over to the staff.

 

“D-gkkck-on't-ucckk-leave-hcck-me!” Long fingers wrapped around Tony's ankle, sending him crashing to the floor with a yell. His forehead smashed into the stone, hands scraped from sliding over the floor. The staff lay just out of his reach, Tony strained to grab it even as Loki's grip tightened around his ankle. Bones ground together and Tony screamed, feeling his ankle fracture as Loki crushed him with his grip.

 

Behind him he could hear Loki's anguish switching to bone-chilling laughter, still interspersed with painful gut-wrenching coughs. Tony lurched forward and wrapped his fingers around the end of the staff just as Loki yanked on his ankle, sending him skidding back over the floor. Ignoring the pain radiating up his leg Tony rolled onto his back and swung the staff, trying to bludgeon Loki right in the head. He wasn't thinking about curing Loki, he was thinking only of survival. Loki let go of his ankle, blocking the staff with one arm while the other crawled spider-like up Tony's leg. “Ssssstaaark,” Loki laughed like a deranged man, his breath reeking of something dead and rancid while blood dripped from his nose and flowed from his mouth; his smile like an open festering wound.

 

“Loki get a hold of yourself!” Tony tried not to sound as terrified as he felt, kicking out at Loki with both his feet only to scream as he wrenched his broken ankle. It served the purpose of knocking Loki back against the edge of the workstation, which was odd considering how strong he was. Tony knew he couldn't run so instead he lunged forward, throwing himself into Loki's lap and gripping his face tightly, forcing their eyes to meet. “Loki! Calm. Down. I know you're in there,” Tony blindly groped for the staff that had fallen aside during their scuffle, slowly picking it up so as not to startle Loki and set him off again.

 

“Focus on me, Loki,” Tony gently placed the head of the staff against the side of Loki's head, able to see how his eyes began to clear. “There you go,” Tony let out a breath as Loki relaxed under him, his heart beating far too hard. That couldn't be good for his health. Loki's eyes finally focused on him completely, narrowing before he shoved Tony off of him and tried to rise to his feet. As with his last fit, Loki merely crashed to the ground with a frustrated yell.

 

“Fuck, stay calm, for godsake!” The last thing they needed was a repeat performance.

 

“You don't know what it is like!” snarled Loki, blood dripping from between his lips and smearing down his chin, “To have something killing you from the inside out! To-”

 

Tony crawled over to place a hand on Loki's back, “To have it slowly taking you apart. And you go on like it isn't bothering you but it is, it's killing you but you feel like you have no options... you've already done everything in your power so it's like you're just waiting to die.” Loki was silent, panting and spitting on the cobblestones as he shook under Tony's touch. Tony knew, he knew what it was like to be dying from the inside out. Poisoned by the only thing keeping him alive. He gripped Loki's chin, forcing their eyes to meet, “However, I learned that help comes from unexpected places.” His father, a man who couldn't take the time to raise him or show him any love, had given him a new way to live.

 

The look Loki was giving him was almost heartbreaking, brows twisted in grief and confusion. Asking where help for him could possibly come from. If Asgard's strongest magic could not cure him, what could? No one was on Loki's side, just Loki. Tony wiped blood from his chin with the back of his sleeve, “Chin up, Rudolph, you're not dead yet.”

 

Loki spat to the side, coughed, and then nodded. His own hand came up to wipe at his mouth, “Stark...” Loki fingers, slick and sticky with his own blood, lightly cupped Tony's cheek which was rough with stubble, “What was killing you?”

 

There were a lot of answers to that question, and Tony knew he didn't have to be honest or answer Loki at all, he could remain silent. Instead he just smiled wryly and said, “Myself.”

 

Loki stared at him, green eyes darting back and forth as he seemed to search for something within Tony's gaze. Tony stared back, oddly unafraid of Loki who could crush him like a tin can should he so choose; or should he lose control again and Tony couldn't calm him down. Tony could not say he knew Loki, not really, but he was starting to really want to, and this parasite was preventing that. Loki let out a small breath, hot against Tony's face, before he leaned in close so their foreheads touched, then their noses brushed, then finally their lips met in a kiss that tasted of blood and something sharp and acidic. Tony's hand curled in the fabric of Loki's tunic as they kissed on the workshop floor, cobblestones digging into Tony's knees, his ankle throbbing with agony. This was getting way out of control. Tony pulled back for a breath, wiping Loki's blood off his lips with his sleeve, “You taste like a car battery.”

 

Loki spat to the side, “Let us bathe.”

 

“Could you, um,” Tony pointed to his broken ankle and then to the rapidly growing lump on his forehead.

 

“Ah...” Loki had a curiously blank look on his face as he reached out to run his fingers lightly over Tony's forehead. A warmth spread through Tony's skin and when it faded the pain was gone. Next Loki leaned over to touch his ankle, this time there was a flash of pain as bones mended themselves, but it was nothing Tony couldn't handle. “Forgive me,” murmured Loki, nose brushing against Tony's as he placed a hand on his shoulder.

 

“ _Two_ apologies from Loki Laufeyson? I must have won some kind of horrible lottery,” Tony grinned and Loki smirked, alleviating the tension that hung in the air.

 

“Come, Stark,” said Loki haughtily, pushing himself to his feet with the help of his staff.

 

Well, looked like someone got their attitude back quick enough. Tony could not adequately express the visceral relief he felt at hearing Loki order him around. It meant Loki was all there. Loki still coughed as he slowly made his way up the stairs, but the potion seemed to be wearing off. “Promise me you won't try the potion thing again,” said Tony as they entered Loki's rooms, now completely immaculate as if last night had never happened.

 

“It has proven to be a failed experiment,” Loki sounded so tired, as if the entire world was bearing down on his shoulders, “I tried to distill another Apple of Idunn with a few other ingredients to contain the madness... and it did do that, but it ate away at me from the inside. I can't afford the strain... maybe I could have early on but...” Loki trailed off and the unspoken words hung in the air.

 

_Too late_.

 

Tony touched Loki's arm, “The important thing is to stay calm-”

 

“Would you stay calm?!” snarled Loki, grabbing Tony by the front of his shirt to haul him close.

 

“I would get drunk, have a crazy party, and then go do a shit ton of reckless things,” said Tony honestly, “I would hurt the people that were trying to help me. So you have to ask yourself, will I do better than Tony Stark did?”

 

Loki let out a slow breath through his nose, fingers uncurling from Tony's shirt, “You are an infuriating man.”

 

“You kissed me,” Tony pointed out, smoothing out his wrinkled shirt as they both walked into the bathroom.

 

Loki's lips twisted into a self-depreciating smile, “I suppose I am drawn to infuriating men... strip Stark, join me.”

 

“Let me get this straight,” said Tony as Loki set the staff against the wall and began to slide out of his bloody clothes, “you want me to strip naked and climb into a tub with you?”

 

“Yes,” said Loki simply, pulling his tunic over his head and dropping it on the floor carelessly.

 

“Okay, just making sure,” said Tony, working on the button on his jeans. That rational part of his brain told him this was the worst possible thing he could do. Laying under Loki and being aroused was one thing, kissing Loki another, but getting naked and clambering in a tub was in an entirely different ballpark. It was impossible to resist his pull though, Loki was magnetic. What drew Tony to him was unclear... but god whatever it was it was potent as fuck. Tony stripped off his shirt without shame, followed by his jeans and boxers.

 

Loki stepped gracefully into the tub, sliding down so his back was against the copper and his legs spread out to the other end. Tony hardly even thought twice before stepping in as well, Loki's wet hands guiding him to sit down between Loki's spread legs, his back pressed against his cool chest. “You are surprising, Stark,” said Loki, cupping water in his palm and splashing it over his face to scrub away the blood.

 

“Look, when a god asks you to step into a tub with them you don't protest,” said Tony, washing off his own face.

 

“So if Thor asked you to join him in the bath you would jump at the opportunity?” Tony could not see Loki's face, but he sounded amused. The thought of joining Thor in a tub the same way he was with Loki had him wrinkling his nose.

 

“Let me rephrase,” said Tony, reaching back to tangle his fingers in Loki's hair and pull his head over his shoulder, “when the god of mischief asks you into a tub you don't protest.”

 

Loki said nothing, instead he reached over Tony's other shoulder to grip his chin and tilt his head back so their lips could meet. Tony could not claim he was making a sound decision, but that fell to the background as Loki slipped his tongue into Tony's mouth, turning what was a relatively innocent kiss into something hot and sloppy and wicked. Loki tasted vaguely of mint, _magic_ , thought Tony.

 

Tony's neck ached from the twisted position so he turned without breaking their liplock so he could straddle Loki's thighs. The more they kissed the more everything wrong with the situation seemed to fade into the background. For just these few short moments Tony wanted to forget he was kidnapped, being kept alive by magic, and trapped with a very dangerous man losing his mind. Instead he was sitting in a warm tub with a smoking hot man. What was going through Loki's mind was a mystery, one Tony wasn't sure he wanted to unravel.

 

“I want to _fuck_ you,” whispered Loki against Tony's lips, cold hand cupping the back of Tony's neck to hold him in place.

 

“Forward, I like that,” grinned Tony, reaching between their bodies to finally wrap his fingers around that heavy cock and squeeze it lightly. He liked the weight of it, thick and hot in his palm as he started to stroke it to full hardness. Loki's lips swallowed up any other blithe thing Tony was about to say, his hands sliding down his body to cup Tony's ass and squeeze, forcing him forward so his hardening cock brushed over Loki's flat belly.

 

Long clever fingers rubbed between the cleft of Tony's ass, brushing past his asshole to press against his perineum in such a way that he squirmed. “Do you want to be fucked, Stark?” asked Loki idly, as if he were discussing politics and asking what bills Tony was supporting. Those long fingers circled and massage against his hole, pressing but never penetrating, and Tony's cock eagerly responded.

 

“Nng, only if...ah-” the tip of one finger, mysteriously slippery, pushed in and then retreated, “only if you promise to be gentle-FUCK!” Tony arched as one finger pushed into him. Loki leaned forward at the same time to sink his teeth into Tony's neck, sucking and licking as that finger fucked into him.

 

“Do you ever shut up?” asked Loki after one last swipe of his tongue over the tendons of Tony's neck.

 

“Not reall-mmph!” Tony's perfectly witty reply was muffled as Loki kissed him. Actually, Tony did know when to shut up; it was right about when a second finger shoved into his hole, making him gasp into their sloppy kisses, followed by Loki's other hand closing around his cock and squeezing. The small bathroom was then filled with the filthy sounds of kissing and water slopping over the edge of the tub as Tony rocked shamelessly back and forth over Loki's fingers.

 

Kissing Loki was a wondrous experience now that he no longer tasted like battery acid and blood. He had thin lips and a long tongue that knew just how to move against Tony, sucking the breath from his body. Tony pulled away for a breath, giving in to another urge which was to pepper that long graceful neck with vibrant hickeys. The parts of Tony that had fought against getting fucked by a super villain had more or less completely silenced themselves, his rational being they both deserved a little pleasure after the last few days, and a happy Loki was a Loki who wasn't vomiting blood and trying to tear his limbs off.

 

If there were other reasons clambering around in his head, Tony refused to acknowledge them as he bit and sucked over the juncture of Loki's neck and shoulder. A third finger pushed into him and Tony paused in his shameless marking to hiss and rest his head against Loki's shoulder. Not because of the pain, but because Loki now chose to curl his fingers and brush Tony's prostate, finally. Loki hummed against ear and the fingers continued sliding in and out of him, occasionally brushing his prostate. It was just enough to drive Tony crazy.

 

“Stand up, Stark,” Loki's voice rumbled against Tony's cheek, teeth scraping lightly against his stubbled jaw.

 

Tony wasn't sure he could stand up with the way Loki was fucking him with his fingers and stroking his cock at the same time. However the thought that he might have something good in mind got Tony splashing to his feet, supporting himself by placing his hands on Loki's head. The fingers in his ass scissored and Tony automatically stood on the balls of his feet, lurching forward only to be swallowed to the root by Loki's hot mouth.

 

“FUCK!” Tony swore and hissed, fingers clenching in Loki's hair as he was sucked off with much enthusiasm, “Jesus—CHRIST—Loki!” The tongue that had earlier explored his mouth now licked over his shaft and swirled around the bulbous head of his prick. Loki's lips were slightly chapped as they slid back and forth, cheeks hollowing to suck every single time Tony felt himself slide down the back of Loki's throat.

 

“Mmmm,” Loki pulled back to hum around the head and Tony's knees almost buckled, held up only by the strong hand at his hip.

 

“Stop stop stop stop,” Tony begged blindly, tugging at Loki's messy hair as he felt heat curl tightly in his belly, “I'm gonna-”

 

Loki popped off his cock with a vulgar sound, licking his lips as he smirked wickedly up at Tony, “You're right, we don't want you coming until you're stuffed with cock.”

 

Tony was of the unshakable opinion that Loki should talk dirty more often. However for once his words failed him, Tony sank down to his knees again, wordlessly agreeing with Loki's statement. Instead of waiting for Loki to tease him further Tony reached back and pulled Loki's fingers out of his ass, groaning at the now empty feeling. It wasn't to last long, Loki seemed content to let him grip his cock and guide it into his ass. “Goddammit,” breathed Tony as he slowly sat down on the thick length, letting it stretch him more than a few fingers.

 

Loki's hand worked at Tony's cock as he slid down his shaft, keeping him hard and wanting through the slight discomfort. When Tony had settled down on Loki's thighs he let out a short breath, feeling stretched and full in a way he hadn't in a long time. Tony wasn't one of those guys that made a big deal over who was doing the fucking, but it _was_ usually him. It felt good to have a nice fat cock in his ass again.

 

Hands settled on his hips, encouraging Tony to start rocking. He sat up just enough to feel the slide of the cock in his ass before sitting back down sharply, managing to draw a gasp from the previously stoic Loki. Oh yeah, he was getting more of those sounds if it killed him. The hands on his hips didn't have to encourage him again as Tony began to fuck himself in earnest over Loki's cock, watching his carefully controlled expression crumble into one of filthy want.

 

No matter how much water splashed over the edge of the tub it still stayed at the same level, which was good because with each hard slam of his hips Tony was sloshing out what felt like buckets of it. Tony panted, hands resting on Loki's shoulders as he bounced up and down in Loki's lap, groaning every time Loki snapped his hips up. Loki had started making small groans, little hisses, and the occasional gasp whenever Tony did something just right. It felt fucking amazing, but it wasn't...quite... right...

 

“Bend over the edge of the tub,” snarled Loki. Tony lurched forward, about to complain as Loki slid out of him, but he didn't have time. The moment his fingers curled over the opposite end of the tub, leaving his ass in the air, Loki surged up from the water and slammed back into him, gripping Tony's hips tightly.

 

Then Tony got _fucked_. He could only hold on to the tub as Loki's hips snapped against him, moaning and begging without thinking as that cock speared into him again and again. Every once in awhile Loki would slow and adjust to press against Tony's prostate, sending bursts of light into his eyes. Here was a man that knew how to play a body like an instrument and Tony knew, if he could help it, he would be rolling with Loki again. His cock bobbed between his legs, leaking precum into the water. Tony wanted to touch it but he knew if he took his hands off the tub he would get pushed over the edge. It was the kind of fuck where Tony was helpless against the intensity, holding on for dear life as his orgasm writhed and pressed in his belly.

 

Loki gasped and swore above him, every filthy word that fell from between his lips only fueling Tony's lust. He clenched around the cock inside him just to feel Loki jerk and hiss, grip spasming over Tony's hips. Loki hit his prostate again and Tony lurched forward, metal rim in his chest clunking loudly against the copper tub. So close! Tony felt his balls draw up tight, that coil in his belly tightening to breaking point. Then Loki slowed down until he was practically stopped, forcing Tony into a painful limbo, moments away from coming but unable. One hand scrambled to reach between his legs but Loki caught it and pinned it to his side.

 

“The great Tony Stark, bent over like a whore,” whispered Loki, hips rocking subtly against Tony, “what do you want, Stark?”

 

“I want to fucking _come_ you fucking _sadist_!” Tony tried to get his other hand between his legs, his throbbing aching cock dying for that last little push. Loki grabbed that hand too, forcing both of them to cross behind his back so Loki could hold them in place with one hand while the other stroked teasingly up and down Tony's stomach.

 

“Do you want me to come inside you?” murmured Loki, clearly reveling in the control he had.

 

“Yes! Just fuck me!” Tony refused to believe that he sobbed those words out, but it was close. Without warning Loki's hands grabbed his thighs and Tony was lifted clear out of the water as if he weighed no more than a cat. He reached back to wrap his arms around Loki's neck, shoulders stretching. His fingers tangled into Loki's hair just for something to grip as Loki started to fuck him again, hips snapping up even as he lifted and dropped Tony so his cock could go in deeper and harder than before.

 

Now all of Loki's grunts were right against Tony's ear, and he savored each and every one of them. Tony's belly went tight as one drop from Loki had him rubbing his prostate, so close- Loki bit his neck and Tony arched, fingers pulling on Loki's hair hard enough to wrench his head back with a snarl. The pleasure of orgasm jolted through him with each splash of come that shot from his cock. _God-fuck-shit_ \--- he hadn't even been touched—Tony yelled without shame, his cries of pleasure echoing back to him.

 

Loki's hips stuttered and then stopped, pressed in balls deep. Tony felt his thick length pulse and when Loki pulled out come dripped from his ass. They paused to catch their breath, Tony's fingers untangling from Loki's hair as he was very gently set back on his feet. He felt like he was made out of jello, and let Loki sit him back in the tub, groaning as fingers pushed into his sensative hole to pull out more come then rubbed over his ass and thighs to clean him off.

 

“I almost feel like myself again,” said Loki lightly against the back of Tony's neck.

 

“Glad...to serve...” panted Tony, still trying to catch his breath.

 

He let Loki half carry him to bed, grinning like a fool as that post-orgasmic haze set in. He had just gotten the fuck of his life from Loki Liesmith... Thor was never going to hear about this part of his imprisonment. Tony was bundled into bed, Loki climbing in after to wrap his arms around Tony tightly, breath warm against the back of Tony's neck. Tony savored the bliss until he fell asleep, where it soured into dreams of his bones ground to paste by the same hands that wrapped around him now.

 

He was sleeping with a time-bomb.


	8. Stop My Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things begin to go downhill

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *cries* Sorry this took so long and is also short. I just got a new job and had six weeks of intensive training coupled with a writers block
> 
> Next chapter is already in the works, and god willing it will be both longer and take less time to write. Much love to all you guys, please forgive me.

Loki kept Stark close as he slept, arms wrapped securely around him from behind. He didn't want to let him go, not for a second. When Stark sleepily protested during the night, Loki held him tighter until he fell into a deeper sleep and silenced. _Mine_ , thought a possessive part of Loki. He traced his fingers over Stark's chest, circling around the metal rim before sinking into the magic still swirling around within it. It was the only thing keeping Stark with him, Loki had no illusions that should he place the reactor back in Stark's chest he would flee. He would not allow it, not now; Stark was all that stood between him and a certain endless descent into madness and then death.

 

He pressed his face against the back of Stark's head, into his slightly damp hair, and took a deep breath. Stark smelled of metal and sweat, of Earth and a sort of musk. Loki loved it, it seemed so foreign a smell, one he should despise for its very nature. Yet he now associated with sanity, he took another deep breath, letting it lull him into a doze.

 

_You are ours._

 

_zzzzcckkkhhh-----vvvvttthhhyyyyy_

 

Loki's eyes snapped open as the voices whispered to him, soft and hissing like wind outside a closed window. He held Stark tighter, ignoring his slight wheeze. Loki belonged to no one, not even to his own madness. Much of it was now in a language he no longer understood, which scared him for he once thought himself fluent in every dialect of insanity.

 

Stark wheezed and Loki realized he was holding him too tight once more, relaxing his grip until the sleeping man settled again. Loki very carefully dug the arc reactor out from under his pillow, resting it against his temple while listening to Stark's soft breathing. Calm. Sane. In control. The voices softened and Loki let himself relax, taking a deep breath against Stark's neck as his eyes grew heavy with exhaustion. A few moments of sleep and then— _vvvcckkkhthhh_ \-- Loki snarled and opened his eyes. Could he no longer get any rest?!

 

A wheeze, “Uhhh Loki... buddy--” wheeze “--could you...gckk...” a hand slapped at his arm and Loki realized he was crushing Stark against him tight enough to hurt. Loki quickly let go and rolled out of bed, there would be no rest for him tonight. He meandered over to his desk, bending down to rest his palms on the scarred wood with a frustrated sigh.

 

“Can't sleep?” asked Stark inanely.

 

Loki wanted to pick up one of his glass beakers and throw it at him but instead he grit out, “What do you think?”

 

“Don't get snappy with me,” Loki turned around and stared at Stark, eyes crawling up his naked chest to his narrowed eyes. He wanted him again. Loki stalked back towards the bed, arousal already tingling over his skin. Stark's brows raised as Loki climbed over him. “Normally I wouldn't protest but-ah-” Loki sucked at his adam's apple, hands rubbing ever inch of skin he could reach, “--I'm not sure... oh god...”

 

“Shhh,” Loki placed a finger over Stark's lips, silencing his fading protests once and for all. Stark was yet again an enthusiastic lover, his body wiping Loki's mind clean and calm once again. It was a relief to come and watch Stark writhe beneath him before they both relaxed over the bed. Loki bit at the shell of his ear, savoring the mental silence that fucking Stark brought him.

 

“As fun as this is, I have to get back to work,” Stark said after a few minutes of oddly comfortable silence.

 

He almost wrapped Stark up, wishing to refuse such a request in favor of keeping him close. Stark was his new cure, not the arc reactor. However Loki acquiesced, allowing him to slip out of the bed and leave. Stark was almost done with his work, then what? The current arc reactor did not work as it used to, so what was the point of having a second built? At this point Loki realized he was only letting Stark continue because he had no other plans, and keeping busy felt better than giving up. Loki sat up in bed, reaching under the pillow to pull out the shining reactor, turning it over in his hand while he thought about his choices.

 

Death seemed inevitable at this point. No spells nor potions worked, only staying unnaturally calm kept him sane...and that was rapidly beginning to cease working as well. Loki snarled to himself, sliding off the edge of the bed and stalking to his desk where the glasses Mephisto had cheated him for sat. They lay there, useless and overpriced, mocking his reckless decision. Even should he survive there was no winner to this situation, no victor. It was either his life or his soul, for Stark's life suddenly seemed too precious a trade to make. This illness was making him disgustingly soft.

 

Only the price of the glasses kept him from crushing them into dust between his fingers. Loki placed the arc reactor back in his staff, dressing in a simple tunic and trousers so he could join Stark in his impromptu lab. On a last minute whim he plucked the glasses up and stuck them in the front pocket of his tunic.

 

Stark was tinkering down in the lab, tiny little tools clicking away in the nearly finished reactor. Loki walked behind him silently, leaning over his shoulder to watch him work. His eyes flickered between the mess of wires tp Stark and the the stubble on his jaw. Stark's usually immaculate facial hair was becoming scraggly. Loki reached out to brush one finger along his jaw, causing Stark to jerk forward with a yell, “I said stop DOING that!”

 

“I know,” Loki said coolly, “it isn't my fault you have substandard hearing.”

 

“I am going to stab you in the eye with one of these picks,” Stark grumbled without teeth, soldering down some wires and then clicking the face of the reactor together. Loki stared down at it, Stark stared down at it. He reached forward to curl his fingers around the cool metal and glass, feeling the weight of it in his palm.

 

“Not done yet,” said Stark, wiping his hands clean on a rag so dirty it couldn't be doing any good, “one last step then she's aaaall yours.”

 

Not if he smashed it on the floor. Loki thought about it, about just smashing every worthless promise he'd ever made and forcing Stark to stay with him until the end. Let them both burn down to ashes, at least he wouldn't be alone when the fire consumed him. Stark was looking at him suspiciously, Loki glanced up from the arc reactor to meet his gaze coolly.

 

“You, uh, you alright there, buddy?” Stark held out his hand for the reactor as if Loki were a venomous snake.

 

Weariness set into his bones and Loki nodded, handing the reactor back. This marked the end of it all, and he was so tired. Stark took the reactor but quickly grabbed him by the wrist before he could turn away, “Hey, I know the reactor hasn't been working as well, what if I just took you back to Avenger's Tower and we could-”

 

“We could _what_?” Loki snarled, a sudden and uncontrollable rage washing over him, “lock me up and wait for me to die? I know you are eager to wash your hands of me, Stark, but I am not so excited to be stuck in a glass cage for the rest of my short life!”

 

“I didn't say that, jesus you jump to conclusions like a fucking frog-”

 

“How dare you speak to me that way-!” A sharp pain in his head, like the lash of a whip.

 

“I WANT TO SAVE YOUR LIFE YOU CRAZY FUCKER!”

 

Stark's voice rang in the sudden silence, Loki's growing headache subsiding as they stared each other down while panting for breath. “Why?” whispered Loki, stepping forward until Stark's back hit the bench behind him.

 

“I don't know,” Stark sounded angry, belligerent, almost embarrassed, “but no one should have to... go through this. I don't care _who_ they are. We have the technology, I think we could figure something out.”

 

Loki reached up, cupping Stark's stubbled cheek gently, “Maybe...” he pulled away, unable to meet those honest eyes for another second, “but it's too late now, I can feel it.”

 

“You're just quitting? Just like that?” Stark spat, shoving Loki in the back hard enough to make him stumble, “you go through all this trouble to kidnap me and get my supplies to build an arc reactor but the minute I offer you another solution you just lay down to die?!”

 

Loki whirled around, the foreign rage building within him again, “Why do you even CARE, Stark?! I am the villain! You should be dancing for joy at my imminent demise, yet you nag me like a woman about it!”

 

“I don't know!” Stark looked ready to tear out his hair with frustration, “I don't _fucking_ know, you're shithouse rat crazy but...”

 

“Finish it, Stark,” Loki trembled, though whether from anger or fear he couldn't tell.

 

“But I don't want you to die,” Stark said lamely, hand rubbing dryly over his cheek.

 

“We don't always get what we want,” Loki looked into the glow of the reactor in his staff, reaching up to finger the glasses in his pocket. His head throbbed, his heart beat too fast in his chest. “Complete the arc reactor then I will release you, as I said I would.” Then maybe he could fall asleep and just not wake up again. Maybe that would be best. Everything hurt now, his head ached, his limbs too heavy, an eternity of rest almost didn't seem enough.

 

The silence was thick, it tasted of disappointment. Why did he care what some mortal thought of him anyway? Stark moved so fast Loki didn't have time to stop him, one minute he was merely staring in disbelief, and the next he was grabbing up the arc reactor, lips pulled back in a shockingly ferocious snarl. With a loud crash it was shattered upon the stone, quickly obliterated by one hard stomp of Stark's boot.

 

“What are you doing!?” Loki dropped his staff, lunging forward to grab Stark by the front of his shirt, nearly hauling him off the ground so their noses smashed together, “have you gone completely mad?!”

 

“I will not play into this pity party,” Stark snarled through grit teeth, “I will drag you to Avenger's HQ if I have to.”

 

Loki shook him like a rag doll, slamming him back against the bench, “do you have a death wish, Stark?! I am losing my mind, I could lose it right here and now and rip you in half! I was giving you a way out!”

 

“So am I,” Stark wheezed, clinging to the front of Loki's tunic.

 

A stabbing pain in his skull, a tenuous grip on control fading. Loki had an intense urge to grip Stark's skull and crush it, to watch his brain explode all over the table then lick his fingers clean. A disgusting and monstrous urge, even for him. With a cry of rage Loki threw Stark to the floor, watching him slide through the scattered remains of the crushed reactor. “Rot here for all I care! If you want to barricade yourself within a burning house then so be it! Let us burn together!”

 

“Loki-!”

 

Stark was reaching for him, blood trickling from a cut on his cheek. His earnest gaze was physically painful so Loki scooped up his staff and ran, blocking the door with a tenuous and unstable magical barricade. He was losing his powers, he was losing his mind. Soon he would be nothing at all. His limbs felt as if they no longer belonged to him, and the trip back to his room was a blur of walls and floors his knees and palms scraped and bleeding. Loki tasted copper and spat out a mouthful of blood as he stumbled onto his carpet, legs giving out from under him. He was a puppet now with its strings being cut one by one.

 

Loki's whole body ached, not just with agony but with longing. Why had he blown up at Stark like that? He was hanging over a precipice by a single rope and couldn't stop sawing at it with a knife. Loki grit his teeth back on a sob, he did not cry. Not even at the end. The parasites could take his sanity, they could take his emotions, they could take his hope; but they would not get his tears. Darkness encroached upon his vision, a thick cloying blackness that stretched slowly and completely over him. There was so much he should have done differently.

 

He supposed it didn't matter.

 

It was time to sleep.


	9. Return My Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The clock is ticking...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ha ha see it went up faster! rhghrggg
> 
> Three, maybe four chapters to go before the end of the story
> 
> as always your comments are treasured and adored, thank you all for your support
> 
> (fyi it would not be remiss to check out chapter 1 again, my friend drew fanart and let me imbed it in the chapter!)

Tony screamed at the ceiling, wondering if Loki could even hear him. He threw himself at the barrier but was blasted back hard enough to slam him into a workbench, toppling him over to the floor on the other side. Tony screamed again, kicking the broken skeleton of his broken reactor, “LOKI! YOU FUCKING COWARD!”

 

It was no good. Tony picked up the shards of metal and tossed them at the fluttering barrier only to have them bounce away. He was trapped here unable to reach the phone, unable to get to Loki. If Loki had not erected the barrier he could have called Steve, help could have been on the way. Maybe he could have talked Loki down. Maybe he shouldn't have snapped at him in the first place. That bullshit self sacrificing tone had made him so furious though, made him see red. It was like Yinsen all over again.

 

Tony slid down the wall right next to the blocked door, drawing his knees up and wrapping his arms around them. What would the Avengers think? Sooner or later they'd make their move, only find two dead bodies in here. What would Pepper think? Tony's head fell back against the stone, tears of frustration pricking the corners of his eyes. His chest alternated between feeling too hot and too cold, heartbeat irregular and strained. Tony pulled up his shirt to see the green magic flickering like an old light bulb. Loki was dying, and he'd condemned Tony to die with him. He should have known better, shouldn't have gotten so close so fast. Tony did not love Loki, but some part of him saw something worth loving. Someday. It was worth enough to save.

 

The light flickered.

 

Flickered.

 

Tony's breath hitched as he watched it, hands shaking as he held his shirt up.

 

Died.

 

The tears held in the corner of his eyes slid down his cheeks, though he was completely soundless. Tony felt his heart beating too fast then stopping then beating again. “I'm sorry everyone,” he murmured, cold fingers uncurling from the shirt to let it fall over the dark hole in his chest. The barrier at the door had disappeared but he was too tired to crawl over there, he could barely blink anymore.

 

Tony fell silent, just waiting for his heart to stop beating entirely.

 

A flash. Tony jerked in surprise as he felt almost an electric shock in his chest. Then a burst of light so bright it seemed to sear straight through his chest and blind him. Tony yelled, throwing his arms up over his eyes as his whole body seemed to vibrate with power. What the _fuck_. The ceiling above him exploded into huge chunks of stone, the very foundations of the castle shaking around him. Tony got up without thinking about it, the fact that he had been dying only seconds ago forgotten. The light in his chest was so bright it almost lit up the whole room with an eery green glow. One last minor explosion and then Loki's limp body was collapsing through the brand new hole in the ceiling.

 

“Jesus christ!” Tony scrambled over rubble to reach Loki, who was coughing and wheezing, digging through his tunic frantically, “hey slow down man, it's gonna be okay I'm going to call Steve and we're going to get you out-”

 

Loki weakly shoved at him, “you're s-such a f-f-fool, Sta...rk...” he spat out a mouthful of thick blood, reaching under himself and pulling out the glowing arc reactor. Tony didn't take it at first, just staring down into Loki's exhausted eyes, “take it you i-id...idio...” Loki made a sound of frustration and pressed the reactor against Tony's chest, forcing him to grab it when Loki's arm went limp.

 

“Just hold on,” said Tony quickly, the hand holding the reactor was shaking so bad he wasn't even sure if he could put it in.

 

“What's the rush?” Loki whispered, eyes slipping shut, “is th-...great Tony S-Stark panicking?”

 

Tony slapped him but Loki's head only fell limply to the side, green eyes staring at Tony listlessly, “I'm going to get help here,” snarled Tony, lifting up his shirt and clicking the reactor back into place. The magic puffed away and he was left feeling heavier than before, the reactor a weirdly foreign presence in his chest. “You're going to be fine, if Thor can't bring you down for good then neither can this, right?”

 

Loki snorted, eyes closing, “Okay Stark, I'm g-going to hold on while you ge...t...h...el..p...”

 

He almost considered that a victory until he noticed that the hand laying by Loki's side was crossing its fingers. “Oh you fucking _bastard_!” Tony swore furiously, gripping Loki under his arms and trying to haul him out of the ruined room. It was pointless to even try, Loki was far too heavy and Tony far too weak after his near-death experience. “I'm going to be right back,” he said to Loki's lax face, “don't you fucking die on me you overly dramatic son of a bitch.”

 

Tony vaulted over the rubble, taking the route to his rooms faster than he thought possible. He tore the mattress off the bed, grabbing up the phone and dialing with shaking fingers. It rang once, twice, and then Steve's voice came on the line, “on our way, Tony!”

 

“Steve, I told you not to bother answering,” said Tony, so relieved he had to sit down on the floor.

 

“Yeah, well, we all agreed that was kind of dumb, we can talk and move at the same time. What's going on?”

 

Tony forced himself back up, jamming himself as close to the window as possible, “Loki is almost dead, Steve, and he's too heavy for me to move. I need him evacuated immediately, are you gone yet?”

 

“Tony you have to give us time to board the helicopter.”

 

“Well make sure some surgeons board with you... and Bruce and Thor, remember?” The cold air flowing through the window was refreshing, calming Tony's heartbeat.

 

“Bruce and Thor are here... why surgeons?”

 

“We're going to be doing some very impromptu brain surgery.”

 

“I'm not that kind of doctor, Tony!” Bruce's voice broke out over the line.

 

“Gotta go, we're in the big castle in the middle of nowhere-”

 

“Tony I am not preforming brain surgery on Lok-”

 

“-4221 Who Knows Where Lane-”

 

“Tony!”

 

“-if the pizza isn't here in 30 minutes it's free okaybyegottago.” Tony hung up right as Bruce let fly a particularly wicked swear that he filed away for later use. He tucked the phone into his pocket, wondering how the hell this was even going to work. Loki had not been extremely forthcoming about his illness, mostly because he didn't seem to know more than he'd told Tony in the first place. There were worms in his brain apparently and....and _shit_ where were the glasses?

 

Tony took the stairs up to Loki's rooms two at a time, but when he got there all that was left was a smoking hole in the ground. He took this time to use Bruce's swear word loudly and without restraint. Tony ran back down again, panting for breath as he stumbled over rubble to Loki's body, which was looking cold and pale. Tony brushed some blood away from his mouth, trying to feel for even the faintest puff of breath. The seconds ticked by for an eternity but eventually he felt air stir against his skin. Still alive.

 

He wrapped his arms around Loki, holding him under the arms to jerkily drag him about a foot before giving up again and sitting heavily on the ground. Asgardians were too damn heavy. Tony slid his hand to Loki's chest and felt something hard in the front pocket of his tunic. Reaching in with two fingers Tony whistled as he pulled out the glasses, a little cracked and bent but otherwise still good. “Now why the hell were you carrying these around?” Tony mused to himself, patting Loki on the chest as if he'd done good work on a project.

 

“You'd better not die on me,” Tony said, pretty sure Loki couldn't hear a word he was saying, “I'll make Thor take me down to that afterlife place so I can kick your ass for being a quitter. Tony Stark hates quitters.” The words fell into empty air to lay around them like dead leaves. Tony snapped his mouth shut, jaw clenching as he bent over Loki's head, fingers tangling in his hair. “Just hold on...”

 

Every few minutes Tony would rise and drag Loki a few more feet, at least until he got him to the door. Blood trickled from Loki's ears, nose, and mouth, smearing all over Tony's skin whenever he checked for breath. Some part of him had been sure that Loki would die in a fiery blaze of madness, yet this slow passing was somehow worse. Loki deserved better than fading away.

 

“TONY?!” A boom echoed down the halls, no doubt Steve or Thor had kicked the door down. Tony sat up, still holding Loki's head in his lap.

 

“HURRY UP!”

 

Steve and Thor rounded the corner, Thor looking worried and wane, “Loki!” Tony backed off as Thor brought his arms under Loki's body and picked him up as if he weighed no more than a child. “He weighs so little,” murmured Thor.

 

Tony burst into hysterical giggles, putting his bloody hands over his face. Keep it together keep it together- Steve grabbed him a little roughly, running for the bottom floor with Thor right behind them. “Bruce and the doctors are on the plane, Tony please explain what you think you're doing.”

 

“L-Later,” he fought back inappropriate laughter as he was ushered out the front door, kicked to splinters, and then onto one of the highly maneuverable cargo jets SHIELD was so fond of. The minute he was on board he tore away from Steve and ran towards Bruce. “Bruce! Buddy ol' pal ol'-”

 

“Good god Tony, what did Loki do to you?” Bruce pushed him away far enough to get a look at him, eyes severe behind his glasses.

 

“Bruce I need you to cut open Loki's skull and take worms out of his brain,” Tony wrapped one arm over Bruce's shoulders, forcing him to walk towards the operating table where Thor was strapping Loki's body down. Even when dying Thor wasn't going to take any chances with him.

 

“ _What_?!” Bruce shook Tony off of him, approaching Loki to check his pulse and lift his eyelids to see the unseeing eyes beneath, “we brought real surgeons, Tony, use them!” Bruce helpfully pointed to the two women hovering a little awkwardly nearby.

 

Tony grabbed Bruce by the arms, shaking him a little desperately, “Bruce Bruce Bruce Bruce-”

 

“Tony-”

 

“Bruce I am asking you not from Avenger to Avenger but from Tony Stark to Bruce Banner. There is no one else I'd trust to do this, not on Loki. You have steady hands, I want the surgeons to talk you through it but I _need_ you to do it.” Desperation leaked into Tony's voice, every second arguing was another second Loki lost.

 

Bruce sighed, removing his glasses to fussily clean them with his shirt, “...Fine... but you can't blame me if... if it doesn't work.”

 

“Doctors get his brain ready for operating!” Tony ushered them towards Loki who was clamped so tightly to the table he was sure there were a few parts of his body without circulation.

 

The women each had a suitcase full of tools and Tony couldn't help but watch with morbid fascination as they started to saw through the top of his skull. Given more time, Tony probably could have devised a more elegant and less messy solution, but it was down to the wire. Sometimes the simplest plans were the best.

 

“One last thing,” said Tony, pulling out the glasses from his pocket and placing them on his own face, “you have to wear these while operating, also I think we need to start a fire in here.”

 

“Tony you're talking like a crazy person,” said Steve, speaking gently as if Tony actually was mentally unstable.

 

He was, wasn't he? Tony took a deep breath, jaw clenching and unclenching as he worked to control himself. “Sorry,” he muttered, sliding the glasses off to hand them to Bruce, “I told Steve briefly that Loki told me that there were worms in his brain. I know very little beyond that. The only way to see them is with these, apparently. Bruce you need to remove everything you see... Thor, once the worms are removed do you think Loki's powers will return?”

 

Bruce hesitantly took the glasses, placing them on the end of his nose so he was looking through two pairs. “I honestly don't know,” said Thor, voice heavy, “hopefully as he recovers so too will his ability to heal quickly. There is no certainty here though.” Thor looked like he desperately wanted to go over to the operating table but was holding himself back, “I wish... he had come to me.”

 

 

“So, uh, these worms,” said Bruce, thankfully interrupting that awkward conversation to be, “when I pull them out what do I do with them?”

 

“Destroy them, er, can we build a fire in here?” asked Tony.

 

“No we may not,” Steve gripped Tony by the shoulders and guided him to take a seat.

 

“I will destroy the parasites,” said Thor, hefting his mighty hammer.

 

“Not on the ship, you're not!” Steve gripped Thor's wrist to pull it down. Tony smiled wanly but it slipped off his face the moment his eyes turned to Loki. The doctors' bodies blocked off everything but his torso and legs, strapped down to the table.

 

“Of course not, you think me a fool?”

 

“Dr. Banner?” One of the doctor's looked over her shoulder, waving over Bruce who was sweating silently off to the side.

 

Bruce took a deep breath, adjusting both glasses on his face. The sight was so ridiculous that Tony wanted to laugh... except the sight of Loki's prone body kept anything from being funny right now. “How does it look?”

 

“There's some... odd bleeding,” said the other doctor, “but nothing fatal, and there seems to be no source.”

 

Tony watched Bruce walk to the operating table, taking his spot between the two doctors at the head of the table. There was a short pause and then Bruce was gagging, “Oh god-!” Tony shot to his feet but Steve grabbed him.

 

“Tony sit down!”

 

“Bruce? What do you see?” Tony was forced to sit back down, but he was vibrating with nervous energy.

 

“I don't-” Bruce gagged, one hand covering his mouth “ggck, could one of you hand me a pair of tweezers or something? And one of your glass j-aaarblh-” he clearly almost threw up but swallowed hard instead. The fact that Bruce was almost throwing up was saying something, since Bruce had probably seen things that Tony couldn't even imagine.

 

One of the doctors uncapped a large lass jar, setting it down with a small clunk beside the operating table. The other passed Bruce a pair of surgical tweezers. Both looked confused. Tony couldn't really see what Bruce was doing, except he would pull out empty tweezers and drop apparently nothing into the glass jar. His skin looked a sickly yellow an every once in awhile he had to stop to get his senses back. Tony wished he could do it instead, but if it couldn't be him at least it was Bruce. Any other doctor might sabotage Loki on purpose, thinking they were doing some good in ending a super villain.

 

Maybe killing Loki was doing some good... but it wasn't good Tony wanted to get behind. Bruce wasn't like that, it didn't matter if it was a small child or a homicidal god, he would help them if they needed help. Or if Tony practically begged him for it. There was tense silence for several minutes while Bruce worked, only the occasional clink of the stainless steel against the glass jar. After a bit Bruce muttered out, “could one of you just... hold the lid of the jar over it after everything I drop in?”

 

“Do you really see something?” asked one of the doctors curiously, placing the lid loosely over the top of the jar while Bruce sweat, pulling out another invisible worm.

 

“You don't want to know what I see,” Bruce said curtly.

 

Tony shifted and squirmed in his seat, getting up a few times only to get pulled back down by Steve. Thor sat in stoic silence, brow dark and stormy. “How's it going, Bruce?” asked Tony, unable to stay silent a second longer.

 

“I honestly don't know, Tony, I suppose there is... less than there was,” Bruce let out a breath through his nose, “just let me work.”

 

Tony was full of restless energy, practically vibrating in his seat as Steve kept a steadying hand on his shoulder. Some part of him expected Loki to start screaming and thrashing on the table, that part of him that craved _something_ from the god other than death-like stillness. It was all very quiet though, and eventually Bruce sighed in the silence of the bay and set the tweezers down on the table with a clink.

 

“Get him stitched together,” he said to the doctors that hurried to work, “Thor, take this outside and vaporize it.” Bruce handed the capped jar to Thor who looked at it with disgust, even if he couldn't see what was inside it. He flew out the back with it while Bruce removed the glasses and shoved them at Tony, “You owe me _big time_ , Tony.”

 

“Anything you want,” said Tony, darting to his feet and grabbing Bruce by the shoulders, “you got all of them?”

 

“All I could see,” said Bruce wearily, “but I think I cleared them out pretty well. We'll just have to wait and see what happens.” They are turned to look at Loki, his upper body was hidden by the doctors, but they could all see his legs stretched out over the table. Tony narrowed his eyes and tried to will a foot to twitch, but there was nothing. Just an eerie stillness. He couldn't help but wonder if they had just preformed an operation on a corpse.


	10. Truth of the Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some bargain with more than you are willing to give.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm just the world's most terrible liar and that's all there is to it  
> this chapter was almost not finished tonight thanks to cookie clicker
> 
> cookie clicker... *narrows eyes and shakes fist*

Loki awoke to an empty room, but he knew he was not alone. The room was full of cameras, he could feel their lidless gaze follow every twitch of his fingers and flicker of his lashes. He was alive. The throbbing pain in his skull was gone but not forgotten, a limb removed that he still tried to grasp things with. What had happened to him between the darkness taking him and now?

 

A machine beeped steadily beside him, his only companion in the cold, sterile room. Loki glanced down at his hands to see tubes curling over his slim wrist, a needle taped to the top of his hand. The tubes reminded him with a sick lurch in his gut of worms and he wrenched them away, shoving the machine into the wall with a crash.

 

“Hey, you'll have to pay for that damage.” Stark stood in the open doorway, leaning against it nonchalantly with his arms crossed over his chest, an oversized pair of sunglasses covering his eyes.

 

“What did you do to me?” hissed Loki, reaching up to cradle his head in his hands.

 

“Uhhh, saved your sorry hide, obviously,” Stark pushed himself off the doorway with his hip, walking over to grip Loki's wrist and pry one hand away, “something that could have happened a lot sooner if you'd come back here with me earlier.”

 

Loki wrenched away from Stark's grasp, “So I am free to go, am I?” the cameras swiveled soundlessly above him, watching him unblinkingly.

 

“Well, Fury doesn't think so,” Tony pulled up a chair and turned it around so he could straddle it and fold his arms over the back, “but I have a feeling you'll find a way out.”

 

As if that wasn't a waste of his time, but knowing that Hel's fingers were no longer stroking up and down his spine was such a welcome relief that he couldn't be angered. No... now Stark was the one in danger. Loki watched him carefully, weighing his options in the oddly comfortable silence. Stark had outlived his usefulness, and now Mephisto's contractual claim upon him could begin, leading Stark into an eternity of torture and who knew what else. Loki could not claim to know Mephisto's mind inside and out.

 

However Stark had also saved his life, or at least bought him some time, and to ignore such a gift was a bit much even for Loki. He did not enjoy being in anyone's debt. Though he was loath to admit it, he also raged at the thought of anyone else having Stark but him.

 

“Penny for your thoughts,” said Stark, “if you're worried about the worms coming back, don't be, I developed a brain scanning machine from samples from your glasses, we had you checked out just this morning.”

 

Stark's smile was so smug and self-satisfied that Loki wanted to slap it off his face. Followed by an intense urge to kiss him silent. “Seems I owe you,” said Loki softly, reaching out with one pale hand to brush the cool tips of his fingers along Stark's lips.

 

“I can think of few ways you can pay me back,” smirked Stark, opening his mouth to suck in Loki's fingers, uncaring of the cameras watching them both. Naughty naughty. Loki toyed with the idea of pulling Stark onto the hospital bed just to let Fury watch them fuck. Loki reluctantly pulled his fingers back, wiping them on the blankets tangled around his chest.

 

“I already have something in mind,” said Loki, shoving the blankets down to find himself clad in a simple pair of cotton pants. He twisted so his feet hung off the edge of the bed, head spinning briefly before fading as his bare feet touched the cool tile floor.

 

“You shouldn't get up just yet,” Stark stood, stepping so he was toe-to-toe with Loki, looking down at him with those stupid sunglasses covering his eyes. Loki plucked them off and tossed them into the corner of the room where they shattered upon the floor. “Hey! I liked those!”

 

“Buy another pair, I do not like you hiding your eyes from me,” Loki pushed himself up, one hand on Stark's shoulder as he blinked away the dizziness. “We need to talk, privately.”

 

“Ooooh, I see,” Stark's eyes contained a mischievous glint, “I think something can be arranged. Give me a day and I'll have you recovering in my penthouse...provided you promise not to destroy it again.”

 

“We don't have a day,” Loki gripped Stark by the chin tightly, holding his face still as he whispered, “we may not have hours, there is sand falling to the bottom of an hourglass that I cannot see.”

 

“So...this isn't about sex, is it?” he almost looked like he was pouting, and the urge to kiss him was strong enough that resisting it was nearly unbearable. What was happening to him?

 

“No. Which is why if you do not think of a subtle way to provide us privacy immediately I will take matters into my own hands.”

 

“Let me guess, you blow up the cameras and then abscond with me to some castle in the rolling hills of Europe?” Stark tapped one finger against his arm, looking around the room with a thoughtful expression. “Well, I could probably get J.A.R.V.I.S to hack into the system and loop a video feed, but it'll take a few minutes and knowing Nick it won't even fool him for a second. As a matter of fact they are probably on their way here right now because this whole room is bugged to high heavens.”

 

“Charming,” drawled Loki, standing on shaky legs to wrap one arm around Stark's waist, “to the rolling hills of Europe it is.”

 

“Are you sure you're well enough to TRAVEEEELLLL-!” Loki dropped through the floor as if the Earth itself had swallowed them whole. There was a tremendous pressure and Stark screamed, grasping his head between his hands as they fell further into the darkness. Loki merely grimaced as Stark passed out. Mortals.

 

Loki did not visit the gorgeous hills of Europe and he did not even take Stark to a castle. When his bare feet ever so gently touched dirt he was before nothing more than a simple cottage, a shack, really. Loki carried Stark easily inside and dropped him unceremoniously upon a straw-stuffed mattress laid out on the dusty wooden floor. His strength was returning quickly, magic healing what Stark's science had not.

 

“Uhhg, god, traveling with you is the worst,” Stark groaned, slowly pushing himself up and rubbing his temple, “where the hell are we?”

 

“Unimportant,” said Loki, folding his hands behind his back as his eyes darted way from Stark to stare at the wall behind his head. “When I tell you what I have to say, I may remind you that telling me to go is not in your best interest. Your science may have saved me... but it is my magic and tricks that will save you now.” Loki finally looked into Stark's eyes, watching the humor draining away within them.

 

“Save me from what? What did you do, Loki?”

 

_What did you do, Loki?_ Was such a common phrase to him that Loki almost laughed at hearing it from Stark. What _didn't_ he do? “I merely bargained with something I am now loathe to be rid of. Mephisto will be collecting soon.”

 

“ _Mephisto_? Bargaining?!” Stark scrabbled to his feet, shoving Loki in the chest, “You used me as a fucking bargaining chip?! What the hell for?!” Stark's color drained as his genius brain placed it all together before Loki could even respond, “the glasses... you told me you paid too much for them...you were talking about me.”

 

“What else would a devil deal in but souls?” asked Loki, grabbing Stark by the wrists before he could lash out at him again. “Need I remind you that I am the _only_ one who can save you now?” he snarled, squeezing Stark's wrists to hold him immobile.

 

“Yeah, if you do as good a job saving me as you did yourself then I feel like I'm in _great_ hands,” Stark drawled, sarcasm dripping like honey from his lips.

 

Loki tightened his grip, watching pain bloom in Stark's eyes before loosening his grip, “would you prefer to deny my help?” he whispered, “do you want me to walk away and leave you here to be found by Mephisto?”

 

Stark pursed his lips, “no,” he grit out, wrenching out of Loki's hands to rub his wrists. “Do you already have a plan or not?”

 

“I do,” said Loki grimly, “however you will not like it.” He reached forward and lightly took Stark's wrists back in his hands, letting the warmth of his newly controlled magic sooth any lingering ache in his bones. With every minute that passed Loki felt more and more like his old self, which included a razor sharp control of both his magic and his emotions.

 

“I don't think I've liked a single thing you've done so far,” said Stark.

 

“Oh?” Loki raised a single brow, backing Stark into the wooden wall of their little shack, “not a _single_ thing?”

 

“I don't think so,” said Stark, placing a hand on Loki's chest to push him back, “you don't get to bargain my soul for a pair of pince-nez glasses and then fuck me until after you've made things right.”

 

“Ah, but you expect us to fuck after I fix this?” said Loki, stopping at Stark's palm to his chest, despite being strong enough to overpower him without effort. “Who is to say I won't disappear from your life forever once my debt is repaid?”

 

“Well... you will of course,” said Stark, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

 

Silence. Loki could not find a reply to that so instead he stepped back and cleared his throat, “come, there is someone you need to meet,” he held out one hand for Stark to take. Stark's fingers curled slowly around his palm, yet more trust unwittingly placed in his grasp. Or knowing Stark, perhaps not so unwittingly. Either way it was a strange feeling, to be trusted. If only a little.

 

Loki pushed open the door to the shack so Stark could see the barren and dead landscape before them. “Where the hell are we?” he asked yet again, wrinkling his nose up at a sky the color of rotting flesh.

 

“All I will say is you have almost been here many times.”

 

Stark was silent, if he understood he did not make it known. It was fine, he would understand everything very soon.

 

Once he met Loki's daughter.


	11. Still My Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the end. This is the end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading
> 
> after I get back from vacation I plan to write a frostiron/thorki themed 30-day porn challenge so come on over and join the fun at salazarsaucystories.tumblr.com or ohgodsalazarwhy.tumblr.com
> 
> Cheers

“Do I really have to go through with this?”

 

“Yes, Stark,” Loki sounded weary as he looped a pair of manacles over Tony's wrists, shutting them without a visible seam.

 

“What would happen, and I'm just spit-balling here, what would happen if you just didn't hand me over?” He looked down at the manacles, a nervous churning in his gut at what he was about to willingly walk in to. Loki seemed to think about the question as he kneeled down to apply a matching pair of iron chains to Tony's ankles.

 

“Mephisto would take me instead,” he said at last, getting to his feet and brushing the dust from his leather pants.

 

And any lingering questions Tony had were swept away by that one answer. “You'd rather risk my hide than put yourself in danger for even a second!” His hands shook, but it wasn't with nerves, anything Loki did for him ultimately served his own purpose, didn't it? Tony was about to walk into something so dangerous he wasn't sure anything would come out right, and he hadn't even had a chance to talk to Pepper or Rhodey or anyone else. If this was the end for him, they'd never know it.

 

“Here's another question,” spat Tony, “have you ever done a single selfless thing in your life?”

 

Loki moved so fast Tony didn't even have time to squawk before a hand was wrapped around his throat, pulling hip up off the floor as if he weighed no more than a box full of packing peanuts. “I could leave you to rot,” snarled Loki, hauling Tony so close their noses squished together uncomfortably, “I could let Mephisto have you, to do whatever he will. _I owe you nothing_!” Tony gasped for air as he was dropped, rubbing his abused throat and looking up at Loki from his crouched position.

 

“You owe me _everything_.” Tony stood and met Loki's eyes fearlessly.

 

An uncomfortable silence stretched between them, the type that slid sinuously between married couples the minute they understood what they had was over. Finally Loki looked away, a small smile stretching his thin lips, “I owe you what I am giving you, a chance for freedom from Mephisto. I do not owe you my own servitude to Mephisto.”

 

“I think you owe me more than that, and you know it,” said Tony, if he was to die today, he did not want any stone left unturned. “I mean, we fucked, we... there was... something...” Tony gestured between them as if to imply that the space was less than empty.

 

“There was desperation,” Loki snapped, “nothing more.” Tony took a single step back, the vitriol in Loki's tone was surprising. Maybe he had hit a nerve. Only one way to find out.

 

“That lie doesn't work on me, sweetheart,” Tony moved in, grabbing Loki by the front of his armor, fingers curling firmly in the leather bandoleer that slashed across his chest. “If you don't owe me servitude then you owe me the truth.”

 

“You ask too much,” Loki spat, gripping Tony's wrist tightly but not shoving him away.

 

“I ask just enough,” Tony stood on his tip-toes, bringing him nose to nose with Loki, their foreheads bumping together as he forced their eyes to meet, “what are you afraid of?”

 

“I fear nothing!” snarled Loki, the lie brazen when Tony had seen fear rolling his eyes in person.

 

“Then tell me the truth!” His wrist seemed to burn where Loki gripped it right above the manacle, his breath surprisingly cool against Tony's face. He was playing with fire, standing before a god and daring him to smite him. Yet Tony could not back down now, not when Loki's resolve teetered so precariously. Without warning Loki grabbed him by the front of his shirt and lifted Tony off the ground, his feet waving uselessly for purchase as he was hefted up until Loki had to tilt his head back to glare at him.

 

“What do you hope for me to say here, Stark? That I love you? I do not!”

 

“I don't love you either!” Tony struggled to get out of Loki's grip, but it was as futile as trying to punch through a brick wall.

 

“So what are you-”

 

“But I could!” Tony gasped as he was dropped, falling to the dusty ground with a clatter of his chains, loosing his balance and collapsing onto his side. He coughed and sat up, awkwardly pushing himself to his feet with his chains restricting his movement just enough to make it difficult. Loki was staring down at him as if he were the crazy one. Maybe he was. “You're a psychopath,” said Tony honestly, tone harsher than he'd been intending, “but I saw more than that. More than you would have liked. More than I wanted to.”

 

Loki kept his silence, guarded it jealously as he watched Tony narrowly.

 

“I want to...see more,” Tony finished, feeling lighter having just got that all out.

 

“Why? What am I to you?” asked Loki at last, lip curling incredulously.

 

Tony shrugged, “I dunno, but I want to find out,” he dared to move in close again, lifting his manacled hands and placing them gently over Loki's head to wrap around his shoulders. “As long as you promise to stop picking me up and tossing me around.”

 

No matter how this turned out, the look on Loki's face almost made it all worthwhile; his dark brows raised and thin lips parted slightly with shock. Loki recovered after a moment, hands settling on Tony's waist to haul him closer, “I will promise you one thing, and one thing only.”

 

“And what is that?” Tony curling his fingers in Loki's black hair, tugging it lightly as their lips brushed.

 

“I promise to never make a promise I cannot keep to you.”

 

“You lying bastard,” whispered Tony, leaning up to kiss the infuriating man silent.

 

Loki kissed back slowly, pulling away to murmur, “One truth, then, just one.” He leaned in until his lips were moving against the shell of Tony's ear as he spoke, “there was _something_.”

 

He kissed Tony one last time then was silent, and nothing Tony said or did got another word out of him. They walked with an air of finality to Mephisto, and the future that Tony would or would not have.

 

“Ah, Loki, you are finally done with him? I was starting to think you were trying to weasel out of our contract,” Mephisto's words of greeting washed over them the minute they stepped into his domain, though he was nowhere to be seen. Tony kept his eyes on the ground, concentrating on walking without tripping over his chains.

 

“I thought about it,” drawled Loki carelessly, shoving Tony forward with a hand at his elbow, “but decided the mortal wasn't worth the effort.”

 

Mephisto laughed, the sound echoing around them as if they were surrounded by a hundred of him each more amused than the last. “I do so enjoy our time together Loki, now hurry along, I want to show Stark his new home.”

 

Loki squeezed his elbow but was otherwise stoic as he dragged Tony further and further into Mephisto's hell. They ascended a crooked and treacherous staircase, Loki forced to pick Tony up and carry him as his legs gave out from under him at the halfway point. Every step was one closer to a future that, for what felt like the first time ever, Tony had no control over the outcome. All the pieces had been very carefully moved by Loki and Tony had been nothing more than a pawn from beginning to end.

 

At the top of the stairs Mephisto sat sideways in a throne made of bones. Slightly over dramatic in Tony's opinion but who was he to tell the current Prince of Hell how to decorate. Loki dumped him unceremoniously at Mephisto's feet, kicking him into his back so Tony was staring up into the devil's smirking face.

 

“I believe this fulfills our contract,” said Loki smoothly, face completely impassive, “I bring you what I promised, the living, breathing, Tony Stark. To do with as you will.”

 

Tony wheezed as Mephisto hauled him up by the front of his shirt, finding it hard to believe that he could now compare two villains doing this and deciding he liking Loki's technique better. “Oh, we'll have so much fun, Tony, may I call you Tony?”

 

“I like it when people call me 'sex machine', personally,” Tony quipped, working his tongue along the back of his teeth quickly so his words were slurred awkwardly. He rolled the little pill out from behind his molars, holding it lightly between his teeth and turning to look at Loki, who gave him no reassuring smiles or small nods of encouragement. He turned back around to face Mephisto, taking a deep breath through his nose before his teeth clenched, the pill crunching in a burst of acidic bitterness. His whole mouth burned, throat spasming as he swallowed the fire.

 

Mephisto's smile was turning to a frown, hands tightening in Tony's shirt. He couldn't breathe, his heart beat too fast. Tony gasped and choked, spit running from between his lips as his lungs started to fail. Loki hadn't told him this would be so painful. Mephisto swam before his vision before he was forcibly shoved backwards, landing with a pained choke at Loki's feet.

 

“Loki! You treacherous snake!”

 

“I didn't do this! I left him alone for merely a second!”

 

He was dying. His sight turning black, his body turning cold. Tony scrabbled at the hard ground fruitlessly, body wracked with uncontrollable spasms. And though he would like to say he trusted Loki, he did not. Tony took his last pained breath.

 

Then died.

 

He stood on a great path, millions of others passed by him with their eyes on the ground. Tony was shoved forward by the crowd behind him, struggling not to move further into the dark and foreboding landscape to which these people shuffled. A hand reached out and grabbed him, pulling him from the crowd and leaving him gasping for breath. Hela stood before him, taller than a mountain yet looking straight into his eyes.

 

“It is time to awaken, Tony Stark.”

 

“Where am I? This is death?”

 

“You will come back to me soon enough, but we made an agreement and your time will not be now.”

 

“Loki-”

 

“Do not concern yourself with him, now come with me.” Hela's pale hand closed around Tony's wrist and with a feeling like a fishhook caught in his chest he was yanked up.

 

“What about Mephisto?” gasped Tony, narrowing his eyes as a light above them grew uncomfortably.

 

“The contract was filled, he owned you and lost you. Though your mortal form was of his domain, your soul belongs to me and me alone.” Hela's tone was final, something Tony didn't like. He didn't want to end up in some Asgardian afterlife, and had hoped that he could find a way out of this particular problem later. Hela seemed to think otherwise.

 

Yet signing over his soul to Hela had been the only way to save him, according to Loki. Tony shut his eyes as the light got too bright to bare, the pressure in his chest making it feel as if the fishhook tangled in his ribs was about to rip free. Just before it got too painful to bare the light engulfed them, and Tony lost himself and the feeling of Hela's grip in the heat.

 

Tony shot up with a deep gasp, flailing around in his huge bed with limbs that felt stiff and and awkward. He wheezed, throat and lungs burning as they took in air, heart beating irregularly as his reactor flickered like a light being turned on after months of disuse. He looked around frantically, but no one was there, it was merely him. No Loki. No anybody. It were as if the entire situation had never even happened.

 

He could _almost_ believe that if his body didn't _feel_ like it had recently come back from the dead. Tony calmed as his body did, flopping against the headboard with a sigh. Was this it then? Loki didn't need him anymore, their debts squared with a life for a life. Tony snorted, looking at his blue fingernails, extremities tingling as his blood started to flow properly, it didn't feel like a fair trade when everything was Loki's fault to begin with. Well, nothing left to do but get on with life again. Loki would do as Loki did. Tony wasn't going to wait for him to show up.

 

“J.A.R.V.I.S.?”

 

“Yes, sir?”

 

“Does anyone know... what happened to me?” He hated to think Pepper had stumbled over his corpse at some point.

 

“No, sir, which should be evident as you did not awake in a coffin, or during your own funeral service.”

 

“Ha ha, very funny,” Tony slid to the edge of the bed, testing his weight on unsteady legs, “what happened?”

 

“I...I do not know, my recordings around the time of your arrival are... corrupted.”

 

Loki. Tony pushed himself up, grabbing a shirt and a pair of sweats to slide on, “well, never mind all that J.A.R.V.I.S, it's time for me to get back to work. I think Pepper is about to go grey and we wouldn't want that, would we?”

 

“Not at all, sir. It is... good to see you well.”

 

“It's good to be alive, buddy!” Tony winked at one of J.A.R.V.I.S's cameras as he stretched with a pained groan. There was a lot of catching up and debriefing to do.

 

Life settled.

 

Tony kept up his work with Stark Industries and the Avengers, with time between to work on his suits and inventions. Loki did not visit him, nor did he cause mischief for the Avengers. Tony expected him slide out of the shadows during the first month, and still during the second. By the third month he thought Loki might start causing trouble. By the sixth he expected nothing, boxing up his memories and feelings with precision.

 

On the seventh month, Pepper asked him to go down to the coffee shop and grab her a drink.

 

“Oh come on! We have interns for this sort of stuff!” Tony complained as she wrapped a scarf around his neck and shoved him out of the office.

 

“They don't need to get outside as bad as you do,” she said, pushing him out with a final grunt, “and get yourself something nice, on me.”

 

“Pep, you're killing me,” Tony gave her the wounded puppy look but she was impervious and he was forced to trudge outside into the cold wind, scarf flapping out behind him.

 

“Have any spare change?”

 

Tony normally waved away the bums, but something about that voice... he stopped in his tracks and turned to look down the dark alley, barely making out the tall slim figure that slouched against the concrete wall. “Who's asking?”

 

“Someone who values change above all else,” Loki stepped out of the shadows wearing a delightfully modern outfit accented with a perfectly pointless green scarf. He looked pale as ever, gaunt and bony with a fire burning out from his green eyes. Madness or passion. Maybe both. Tony swallowed his surprise, trying to be nonchalant.

 

“I thought we were even,” he said, glancing around quickly to make sure no one was watching before slipping into the alley.

 

“Oh we are,” purred Loki, immediately boxing Tony against the wall, “but that doesn't mean we are done. I found myself thinking of your often these past months. About how you said you wanted to see more...and I thought... I enjoy the idea of someone being _just_ as mad as I.”

 

This was a Loki uninhibited by sickness, wild nature paradoxically controlled. All the feelings Tony had packed away were shoved off the shelves of his mind to explode over his thoughts in a jumbled mess. He gripped the front of Loki's stylish jacket, looking up at him with a growing smile, “You want to try something?”

 

“Oh, Stark,” whispered Loki, leaning in to nip at his lips, “I want to try _everything_.”

 

Loki kissed him fiercely, one hand resting over the arc reactor. Tony brought one hand over to cover it and hold it in place.


End file.
